A day In the Life of An Ironic Guy

2010-06-27T04:28:00.001-08:00

Wonderin'

Its been a year when my life made sudden turn. It wasnt just a simple changed that took my way, it was abrupt and created a big impact in my daily routine.

My life was then a simple journey, a quiet voyage towards my dreams, making the most of what the world offers along my trail. As I continued my trek towards the summit, you came. Exactly a year ago, you made your presence felt in my travails. You made the change that i never asked, or should i say expected too soon as I was nourishing a sophisticated past. You redefines life. You created change. Change that was somehow welcome yet terrifies me as i was bordering to an old territory i once was. Afraid that that history would repeat itself, but then something tells me to pursue it, to adopt unto the change.

And my life was never been the same again. It was a roller coaster ride with the new life. A journey worth taking but then it was short-ended. The entrance was unnoticed and so was the exit. It hurts that it made a scar into the innermost pith of my being. It was indeed a struggle to be back to the old self. I was wondering then how in the world could i put myself back to the world i once had, a simple , no complicated life.

"Ive always supported your happiness, or at least try to.." so you say, but i felt otherwise. For whatever its worth, I would like to say Thank you for the memories. I wouldn't be the what I am now , if not of the changes that you made into my life.

2010-06-06T06:42:00.001-08:00

INK REFILLED

Its the usual habit. For the past schedule run , its a saturday-sunday rest days, so the usual routine almost always take as if scheduled on cue or should i use the word queue *wink*. Last sunday, after i attended mass, i had a quick shopping at bench-ayala and I had Jon with me, that gorgeous batchmate of mine back in my language training days. Actually 'twas an unscheduled meeting. I just rubbed elbows with strangers in the mall when i suddenly realized a familiar figure, the rest as they say is history.

Fast forward.

Today. Its sunday again. A blessed sunday as its always been. I attended a pontifical mass at the sacred heart parish church, afterwhich i dropped by at Ayala.

Wait. Why in the first place im back to blogging. My old self has transported me from the blogosphere to the bookworld. The ink has been drained for the past months or should i say years? My last blog dated sometimes in 2009 when Kris Allen took the crown for AI 8. Maybe enough of telling the world the "whats new" in my life.

Then back to the question, whats with the comeback?

Well, i was just reminded by Chino about this blogging. Haha. Of all the things he could have tell me , its about the error in my last blog, grammatical error it is. I checked it a while ago, and indeed, there was an error. Suffice it to say, his years in the callcenter industry has made him brighter if not wiser. As always, i stand corrected, but the blog would remain as it is, to preserved its original flavor, sour it may seem.

Im thinking of what to write tonight, and my mind just cant help but to scrutinize the once cute and dashing debonaire Chino. Oh well, i half expected the appearance, given the fact that i once took a glimpse of his facebook photo album proudly showing the arsenal of fats on his tummy, but the meeting was nonetheless unexpected.

The truth is, before the start of the mass, he crossed my mind, maybe because his birthday is coming right up or it was just a random thought, but for whatever it is, im glad ive seen him and had a quick chat with him. Now as you know in every blog that i had before where he once starred, i havent failed to make the blow by blow account of his utmost appearance.

Though sporting a chubby, no pun intended for streetwise lingo fanatics, he still oozes a magnificent appearance, lets just leave it as it is, the torso part could be mutilated away to give grace to the once angelic aura. But the look in his eyes is far wiser than his years. And im proud to note, he made a 360 turn from where he was then headed. He donned the that red/orange shirt which i wore couple of times before, it was in my possession quite sometimes, the very same shirt that reminded me of the night i had with Jelson.,. oh uh ! jelson who!? hahah. the ghost from our past who keep on resurrecting trying to make a vengeance, in the end, truth prevails and so are we.

At the end of the day , it was the hug from a friend whom i missed that makes this sunday memorable worthy to be immortalized in this humble space.

NOW im thinking, would there be another error on this piece that could be another hint for future meeting? hahaha. no time to look back, as my mind raced to join Cotton on his journey.

As my blood is refilled with the inks of memories, i surely am glad to have revived the passion to document life's simplest moments unraveled through the grand scheme of things weaved perfectly to be archived in this game called LIFE.

Just my rantings... just my random thoughts.

good night everyone.

Jovit Baldivino Carrie Semi-Finals May 01, 2010 Pilipinas Got Talent Top...

2010-05-02T00:00:00.000-08:00

2009-05-20T19:14:00.001-08:00

Winner Takes It All

Ive been a fan of watching reality based tv shows and competitions. Its one of my guilty pleasures on my day to day life. Three reality shows has wrapped up its season , and I did followed these shows religiously all throughout the season, though i miss some of the episodes, nonetheless i could safely say, i am an avid follower.

First to end its season this year is The Amazing race season 14. From the very beginning, i always am rooting on the mother and son tandem of Margie and Luke, and fortunately they made it till the final three. However, deserving winners brother-sister team up of Tammy and Victor made in the end.

Second to take its curtain down is the finale of Survivor Tocatins : The Brazilian Highlands, my favorite TJ emerged victorious, this guy shows toughness and discipline all throughout the game. And the best thing he did in the show is when he choose Stephen to be with him in the finale over Erinn. If you look closely at it those of you who are following the show, it would seem to be easier for JT to win the million if he choose Erinn but he sticked to his closest ally in the end, but if its stephen who won the immunity, he will choose Erinn instead, a different view of the million, putting in the garbage bin his bromantic partnership with JT. Erinn tried to keep her place in the final two by trying to break JT’s trust to Stephen when the latter informed her that he would choose her over JT but it didnt matter to JT as the real warrior has a heart of his own. Congratulations James “JT” Thomas Jr.

And finally, earlier, the season 8 of the famed American Idol crowned its newest singing sensation Kris Allen. All throughout the season, Kris slowly but surely rises to fame, but Adam Lambert showed much stronger force with his originality and vocal prowess. In the end, its America that has the final say.

2009-05-15T18:06:00.000-08:00

ANGELS & DEMONS::Which Side are You?

A follow up movie to the 2006 controversial film The Da Vinci Code, Angels and Demons is the first adventure of symbolist Robert Langdon so this story is a prequel to the The Da Vinci Code.

A substance called antimatter which can erase the entire vatican in the world map was stolen at CERN. At Vatican, the pope died and a conclave is on going for the replacement of His Holiness. Four of the favorites to be elected to papacy are missing. The ancient group called 'Illuminati' seem to take its revenge to the church. Four cardinals to be castrated 4 hours before midnight each on four different locations across Rome following the path of Illumination, a sacred lair of the greatest minds in science who were once doomed by the catholic church as enemies. Symbolist Robert Langdon has to take on the clues hidden in the manuscript of Galileo as well as to the architectures to get into those churches to save the cardinals and eventually save the entire city from oblivion.

The movie is not faithful to the book. I read the book four times and i could safely say that there are some discrepancies in the movie version. Although i would understand that there are some cinematic license that would make the movie separate from its book , i could not take as to why some important facts and characters were thrown away just to save time in the movie version.

I still think the illuminati diamond idea is far better than the cross upside down as the fifth symbol. And whatever happen to the important character in the movie who was the instrument for the disclosure of the camerlengo as the brain of all the chaos? Koohler, the director was removed for some dumb reason, and oh, where's my favorite character, the witty BBC reporter Gunther Glick who in the book was everywhere and became an instrument for camerlengo Carlo to broadcast to the world and displayed his drama that God spoke to him as to where the canister was placed. And what a shame to have an elected pope not in the conclave in the first place. LOL.

If you find the movie Da Vinci Code so slow that it would take you to sleep with its long narrative, by far stretch Angels and Demons is faster with beautiful sequences and locations that give you an up tempo , but the narrative is still there. Imagine people on the run against the clock, still has the time to discuss the passages of the book or the architectures they passed by, although you could not blame it because they need it for the audience to understand the clues as well. For those who have not read the book, and are not into crazy conspiracies and religion versus science, its easy to get lost. Aint it cousin Debi?

For all its worth, those who love the book should at least try to get a peek to this movie version to see how Ron Howard made the movie version horrible at some point.

2009-05-07T02:21:00.000-08:00

DISCO: the way it used to be

I went home to bohol last May 1 to 4 to celebrate the fiesta in honor of our patron Sr. Sta Cruz, thanks to my beloved tl who managed to make a way to make my SIL possible, and of course to the two agents who gave their SIL to me RJ and joy.

One of the highlights in a barrio fiesta is the disco! I remember the days when fiesta came, we werelooking forward when the sun sets in and the disco lights started to dance and the music dominates the airwaves, we were on our best get up possible and ready to conquer not the bar but the tennis court fenced with a bamboo all around. With the not so cold san mig beer and some peanuts , we enjoyed the groove, the people, and the night in general under the lonely moon above.

Of course on my last homecoming, disco was there, not once but twice! *wink* , on the first night, that was the night before the fiesta. Me and my cousin, haha she doesnt want her name to be put in her, we went there, and join some folks in a table occupied by the kin of my big brother's wife. Well, we were just there looking around, checking on every person that entered the place , criticize their outfits, their moves and everything we could talk of just to pass the night and we noticed how cheap , oh uh sorry for the word, to be on the center to dance with the crowd, so we decided to just be contented with drinking our beers and enjoying the music and the conversation we had with our cousins, good looking they claimed, haha , jojo and patrick. well, we never saw anybody to match our genes , lol. We went home at around 2 am when our bodies were cringing to go to bed, never did our body groove to the music nor our feet made a single dance step. but somehow it was worth the visit on the place we once enjoyed in our yesteryears.

then came the fiesta night. we went to our cousin's house and there we had a drinking session and off we went to another disco fever , this time around near the school where i spent my elementary years. This time around, we dance! yes I did dance haha. together with my cousin jojo, patrick, audrey, geraldine and my classmate charles. Well there was a hotchick but it seemed that she is exclusive to another hotchick which charles failed to have a dance with no matter the effort to convince her.

The overflowing beer is courtesy of my cousin patrick, well fyi, he is from norway and he joined the audition for pbb and was shortlisted as finalist in bohol, hopefully he will make it to big bro's house. Going back to the beer, well my full tummy didnt quite hold all the fluid intake and made me vomit wherever possible. hows that! lol.

anyway, i enjoyed the night. we all enjoyed the night. A reminscent of the years i spent in bohol, cheap it may sound, but who the hell cares... we enjoyed, and the bonding we had with my cousins is a rare instance since we are separated miles apart... but Marian Debra Jamorol didnt dance...ooops, i mentioned her name...sorry!

2009-04-22T21:42:00.000-08:00

T2 SUCKS

For all its intent and purpose, i am not in a way satisfied with this movie. I was hoping it would at least equalled if not surpassed what Sukod and Fengshui had achieved.

T2 is a story of a little girl who is turning 9 years old. She lost her parents while still young. her mother being one of the engkanto is set to get her as her birthday approaches. Then she met Claire (Maricel Soriano) an NGO volunteer who is tasked to take her to some relative.

I am so disgusted with the movie. Its not worth my bucks, i should have watched another movie instead. I assumed being a star cinema - chito rono tandem is backed, a top calibre horror film is in the offing, but it failed to give what sukob and fengshui did. If not of the great sound , i would have fallen asleep.

Due credit to the child actress on the film though.

2009-02-25T23:47:00.000-08:00

In Dilemma

There would always be a time in your life that we have to face a dilemma. Something that we have foolishly done that couldnt be rectify , and all we see is ourselves in the midst of trouble. Worst thing is that, we could not do anything but wait for what would be the outcome of the action we have done. There might be no bad intention on what we did, but the end really does not justify the means.

Yesterday, i have done something out of lapse of judgment or whatever the reason behind such idiotic action i did. And now i am facing a big trouble. In fact i learned about the mess that i made up created a big stir within my shift. Imagine taking calls at the same time, imagining how and why i was such a fool to make that mistake and how would i be able to get out of the chaos i indulge myself with. I thought of the possibilities of my action, and the worst possibility made me shiver in fear that my mind traveled to a different world while someone on the other end expressing his frustration and asking for some remedy. Thank God i came back to my senses before my customer started to become irate and i was able to help him with his concern.

The big problem now is i am not the only one affected with such crazy move. It would be alright if i could bear all the sanctions and punishment that this thing may lead to, i am worried much about the effect of this to someone whom i have a high respect. His such an innocent player in this foolish game that i started to play, and he should not suffer whatsoever. It would be more painful for me if someone else will be lashed for something that i did.

I hope that whatever be the outcome is, nobody will be affected on this. Not the one that has not shared the insanity of my action. Although i still wish that everything gonna turn out fine, slim chances it may seem, i am not losing hope, but if worst comes to worst, i should take all the consequences of this dilemma. Nobody should bear the burden of what i have done.

I am sorry, if i could turn back time, i wouldn’t have done it. It wasn’t my intention to put you in the situation where I should be responsible of. I know my apology would not change anything, but i am just hoping that you will know that it was an honest mistake.

Im so sorry.

2008-12-16T05:41:00.000-08:00

The Night with Aiman

Just after i woke up , i received a message from K-O-N-I haha. popularly known as Aiman!

Jr, naka bhouse? … 1:35 pm from Aiman

I told him i just woke up and might be going to church at 4oclock. he told me he might be coming , he will be with his mother in ayala and will drop by at my boarding house.

There you go, i heard the 4:00pm mass and then i went to ayala to shop a little. haha. well obviously “bench” is where i headed to. after buying a pair of pants, a bag and some bench body undies, had to drop by at the department store to buy some clothes. There was a little show there, live mannequins! watching in awe for those models beauty, i got a message from aiman again.

jr, nsks bhaus? hehe padung ko dha?

i told him im not in my boarding house, then i continued watching the models when someone tapped my back. Aiman he is!! couple of chit chats and then we were separated as we tried to buy some stuffs. After which we headed to my bhouse.

Just before we reach the boarding house, aiman ask for a drinking spree which i gladly accepted, afterall its been a long time since my body tasted beer. We put our stuffs unto my room then proceeded at the nearby convenience store for the drink.

We did had a great conversation about anything, oh, most of it was about our team! and then after two bottles, someone from his previous team joined in which later on went home ahead of us. And then another one came in, Ian, working as a chef in waterfront hotel, aiman’s fraternity brod.

Ian got the height and oh well a lovely face nonetheless. Seem harmless in anyway and friendly at that. we jive in easily as the beer-filled glass did a round robin in our lips. Then 2 more came in which made the night a bit more livelier. Well it seem that the night endles, however at around 1:30am we were tired and exhausted and decided to call it a night.

The three of us went to my room to end the night. Poor Ian, he must been dizzy that time as he laid down seconds after we hit the room. Aiman on the other hand was very much alive and kickin’ very typical of him. haha. still looking great with the black shirt he wore. no thanks to the tummy lolz.

Twas a great night indeed!

2008-11-14T03:15:00.002-08:00

LOVE OF SIAM
Thailands official entry to best foreign language category in Oscar 2009

height="344">

2008-09-26T06:21:00.006-08:00

TEAM OSPREY - a team like no other

"If its any consolation, this team was [is] the best team that i have the chance to be part of"
---Edgar Allan Niere: TOIC team Osprey

People coming from different places , each of different unique character of their own, shared the same passion, under the guidance of a great person, we eventually formed a solid group , a camaraderie tested by times and now is going into oblivion.

Here i am again sharing to you all as my heart bleeds for the team that i learned to loved. the teammates that i learned to enjoy the company. and the company that i will always treasure.

Sheryl Rose
I call her pokpok. hmmm literally and figuratively. haha kidding. this girl can bagged ms friendship award with no protest. surely she is a friend to evryone and sometimes she go overboard with her closeness to people that she would got an impression of being a playgirl - hence - my monicker for her: pokpok. But i would not deny that she is very nice girl to be with. no apprehensions and she will go with you thru ups and downs. very caring and could cheer you up everytime when life seems playing a cruel game on you. Thanks pok for everything youve done to me.
thats pokpok, caring, lovely, friendly

Karl Dedene
Very sweet girl possesing such perky voice and attitude. She would never feel exhausted all throughout the shift, at least thats my impression because she seem not be tired to be perky complete with a smile during the entirety of all her calls. but mind you, when she got something to rant about, she will do it in a manner like everyone would need to comment and discuss it till the wee hours. huh!!! super dedene she is!!! good luck future mom. i am sure you will become such a sweet mom to your future angel.
super dedene - perky - sweet - mom to be

Luigino Marcelo
Undeniably he learned fast considering his background with the business world, he quickly learned the trick of the trade in the call center industry, a talent that catapulted him to become the number 1 agent on the floor for the month of august. Although we rarely see him taking calls as he seem to be often absent more than being present, he still added a piece to make up the entire team osprey.
thats lui - businesman - fast learner - number 1

Jacquelyn
She indeed is worth a second look. Whats with her sexy body that would make you believe she hasnt bear a child yet, she maintains a figure so hot that would be an envy to every woman and a fantasy for each testosterone loving specie called men. Jacq-jacq sported a very complex mix personality. With her gift of gab and funny antics - she surely can bring you to cloud 9. Behind the laughs is a woman of pure heart that would melt dearly for a beloved friend. very emotional she is that she shed tears during our last GA.
thats marimar - funny - loving - emotional

Dona
This girl seems to be aloof and have distanced herself a bit from the team. I really could not figure out why. On the production floor, she had that mix persona of sweet yet strong enough to intimidate you, but she surely is a fine young woman. When she joined the last GA, she did shown to us that she can well mix with the group and enjoy our company
thats dona - mysterious - sweet - determined

Sharon
Shao shao as what our team lead christened her. Very talented and she really shown effort to assemble the group and to have fun. She aint just for fun because she excell both in work and with the extra activities at the workplace. VCS Idol anyone?
thats shao shao - talented - friendly - high-achiever!

Tyn-tyn
i wonder why our team lead is fond of giving a new name. anyways, tyn tyn used to be a close friend of mine but things changed that drifted us apart. We went on different directions quietly without prejudicing the harmony of the whole. After that she soar up and became one of team osprey's best agent. huh! come to think of it, i maybe the jinx in her life. hahaha
thats tyn tyn - achiever - friend - best

Lyra
super hot momma she is! with touch of class and glamour, she can carry sexy outfit on the floor. She can give justice to every statement shirt we wears and looks hot. But she aint just a hot woman because she is also doing great with her craft.
thats lyar - sexy - hot - classy

Anna Marie
Bote is her family name. and as usual our team lead christened her with a new name and now she is officially called boat! Very weak and fragile by stature but determination is great that she can move mountains so to speak.
thats boat - silent - weak - determined

Ma. Asvi
I am not very close to this girl but i saw her a soft-spoken woman who just go with the flow and would not have any protest on whatever the group has come up with. basically a cool girl to hang.up with.
thats ass-V, cool - cool - cool

Marissa
Very tough lady. determined and a strong woman. She maybe tough but she also has a soft side in her when it comes to friends and loveones. When she walks into the floor you would surely notice her especially if she deliver her infamous line "IN YOUR FACE SIR" a phrase that she only can deliver with much conviction and justice! POBRE MARALITA DUKHA WALANG PERA ! who else can say these words with great fluency and right timing other than her.
thats marsian strong - tough - determined

Reigee
I dont know her that much but i know this woman has a good heart and a nice girl to reckon with
thats mommy gee - nice - kindhearted - mommy!

Marie Victoria
I despise her at times maybe because of her indifference or it maybe about me that doesnt fathom that dept of her personality, but she is very helpful to the entire team. Unselfish of her product knowledge, eager to learn and happy for others improvement. She walks the floor with authority and sophisticated glamour!
thats victoria - sophisticated - unselfish - knowledgeable

Mary Jane
She is a girl who is always smiling and has cool temperament. She is unselfish with her product knowledge and willing to support the entire group. Very great person to be with though she wont drink nor smoke she can tolerate the group and be with us till we call it a night. beat that!
thats MJ, supportive - kind - cool-tempered

Jean
Mommy cat is indeed gods gift to team osprey - she organized our outing - she lead us - she makes us laugh and everything in between. such a jolly person that you would not forget and would always have a special place in my heart.
thats mommy cat - leader - organizer - friend

Edgar Allan
And of course to my team lead. A very supportive, knowledgeable, cool and determined team leader. He handled the team of different personalities and able to make us bond and made the team an envy to the others.
thats niere - motivator - cool - best TL/SME

And we are now in a threshold of another horizon. A new place to conquer, yet our heart will always belong to Osprey the original - another batch of agent may compose the team , it cant be denied that they will always be a second best for there is only one best team in our hearts and its the team that we once belong.

Thank you team osprey for the colorful months we shared. for the experiences, for the laughters and tears. I could not make it without you all. EAch of you give significance into my first 6 months of my career as an agent. I will always treasure you all and you will always be a part of my life. thank you very much. This is not really goodbye but until then.

2008-08-14T18:33:00.001-08:00

Lucky 888

Another angel graced our clan. Unexpected it maybe at first but it always be a welcome addition. No regrets now that baby Arianna Danika is here. Just like when sugar came into this world, there were angst and pains associated with her coming, but it was erased as she first saw the light of this world. True enough baby Aya give us a repeat of what sugar had done into our lives. Happy moments are always here when an angel is coming.

When I saw the picture above, i was at my workstation and cant help but have a teary eyes. The matriarch of the clan in her second nonagenarian year, able to witness the coming of her 5th great grandchild. A perfect picture that is bound to become a classic in the years to come.

And so we continued to add a number to the list.

1. Allan Banac Salipong

2. Almie Jane Salipong-Carriedo

3. Gladys Joy Rebuta-Solera

4. Junn Rey Banac Salipong

5. Diadem Rose Jamorol-Fortunato

6. Marian Debra Banac Jamorol

****

7. Noremelle Banac Salipong

8. Alexander Salipong Carriedo

9. Angelique Salipong Carriedo

10. Psalm Ivanna Rebuta Solera

11. Arianna Danika Jamorol Fortunato

Welcome to the list baby Aya... you really deserved to be part of it. A clan of geniuses and the beautiful. beat that!

2008-07-25T23:11:00.002-08:00

Ive been an avid fan of grisham since the first time i read his book - the client, and a couple of other books like the pelican brief and the testament. The latest i read is the book entitled the Partner, which i bought from National bookstore.

The Story
As usual grisham dealt with the judicial system where his main character is a lawyer who embezzled money in the sum of $90,000,000. Patrick S. Lanigan is his name, who faked his death. Nobody hinted that it was a fake death not until they found out that along with his death was the money gone to nowhere. Four years of search with three interested party is after of Patrick who now resides in a small town in Brazil under a new name Danilo Silva, a totally different man from Patrick. Danilo entrusted the money to a Eva Miranda also known as Leah Pires.

A dead man cant run forever,as the book catch phrase says. True enough, after being able to run away from his past for four years, Danilo was caught and was tortured and was in the center of the greatest trial that is about to take place. Danilo's lawyer is preparing for his defense, his loved one's are praying for him and his ex partner waiting to give out their revenge, but only Patrick knew he will win the battle, because nobody in the world knows what he knows...the truth...

******

The book is another masterpiece by grisham. Although he somewhat diverted from the usual handsome and hungry young lawyer in American judicial system, still the author gives you a breathtaking narrative into the adventure of Patrick/Danilo into maneuvering the legal system of America after carefully planning it for four years of running.

A must read for any bookworm out there and you might passed your sleeping hour just to finish reading the book till the end. Its plot, sub plots, twists and turns would take you off your seat as you continue to follow the travails of greatest white collared criminal of his time.

Read the book and be enthralled... Relax and enjoy.

2008-07-11T05:41:00.003-08:00

Life at Call Center

I just recently signed my 4th month assesment for my performance at the call center where i am currently employed. So far so good. Been performing better compared to the heyday of my career as an agent. I managed to hit all my metrics and thankfully I am endorsed for regularization. Just an FYI, the 4th month assessment is one of the basis for our regularization, although there are still two months more for probation, i can now breath a few sigh of relief as I managed to perform and improved my craft each day. My team lead is now seriously pursuing to have a promotion for me, so he is pressuring me to do better, performed better and act in accordance to the code of conduct to make sure i am eligible for promotion, but the metrics this time around is higher and i am pressured to work harder too..HUH... but before going to the promotion thing., lemme share to you my observations and/or realization on the night mortals and the nocturnal world of call center.

first lets have some fun facts:

> call center agents are disoriented: it could be because we tend to incorporate the philippine time and US time...hmmm

> agent seem to have some hearing problem: hahah because agents usually are exposed to irate customer so we managed to become an expert to put their ventings into a deaf ear

> agents are on EOP (english only policy) even if talking to a "konduktor sa bus": hahaha well sometimes we tend to forget we are now beyond the 4 walls of the production floor, and still thinkin' that everyone we are talking to are americans.

> agents would call their midnight meal a lunch: well what else shall we call it than a lunch for our night are considered daytime.

> agent would still say goodnight when going to sleep even if its already morning: see above comment.

now lets take a look to some other observation in the call center world

< call center is now a new haven of gay religion: wherever you look at it, left to right you could see at least one gay agent. These mortals ranges from different categories. Those who are gays in the truest sense of the word: crossdressers, wearing make up, who acts and feel like they are women trapped in a man's body.; there are those who are proud of their sexuality but are decent enough to wear what is due to wear for their gender; there are also those who tried to cover up their true colors but their vanity and choice of words can lead up to conclusion that they belong to the third sex; still there are those whom you cant see any trace of being gay but you will soon found out somewhere outside the workplace holding hands with the same sex; and most of all there are those men who are men by heart but are weak enough to give in to the request of the third sex to get laid.

< the call center world is a domain of people with super "tupperware" attitude, in short, plastic. Well i admit we need to be perky and some kind of cheesy with lots of sweet toppings to our customer to be able to build rapport and have the customer feel satisfied with the service we gave, but agents usually failed to depart personal lives from the conversations we had with our customers. An attitude that is kept hidden in the name of the word professionalism, but then again, i cant help but noticed it.. INasmuch as I want to believe that in the company i am employed at, there is no politics, but i could sense something else.. huh

< contrary to everyone's thinking about call center, big bucks is not as easy as it seems to be. Yes, we are compensated higher and better than the other industries around, but our work being on a graveyard shift is not that easy. sigh.

***********

Well i dont see myself getting old with this industry. but hopefully i could spend more years here before i could settle down and comfortably sitting on a couch and enjoyed the fruits of my labor. God bless all the call center agents around. You all deserved an applause.

2008-07-05T20:31:00.000-08:00

WHEN

Nobody can ever promise you that they will never hurt you., because at one point in time, it will happen... its just a matter of ....WHEN.*********

Friendship gone sour you may call it but literally with its goodbye there lies reasons. Theres an end in everything, you dont know WHEN. Just be ready to accept the fact that the only thing permanent in this world is change.

At first i thought my friendship with borj will be forever, but then we had gone into a crossroad where he had to prioritize someone in his life, well it doesnt mean i guess that i aint important nor special, its just that he really needs to choose over love and friendship., naturally the former has the advantage. And there ends the beautiful music we had. call it priority.

Then my friendship with jelson next. Hmmm . I may not consider it the best of friendship that i had, but then i had a high respect on him before everything was unravelled into the real world. Friendship mixed with jealousy and pride has nowhere to go but to the garbage bin. call it INSECURITY.

Now here comes another friendship in about to go into oblivion. Just a quick recap, this friendship has gone into a roller coaster ride with times. There was a time when we lost contact only met again in the clan we used to be part of. Then back to out of the world contact until i found myself here in cebu and brought up the idea of him coming over. And the rest as they say is history....

Now barely less than 3 mos., were now closing our chapter together. Moving apart into a separate direction to move into ones vision, guided by principle and desire to achieve one's goal. We may not be on the same page now, i have come to realize that its indeed a great way for me to avoid completely hating the person that he now become. Afterall, i still wanted to cherish the good old days we have... now what do you call it... its for you to give a word...Freedom from bondage...

***********

Freedom is something everyone wants to have at some point in time, but then, we cant remain free anyway... because one day we'll realize that to be with someone is much better than freedom itself.

2008-06-20T21:41:00.002-08:00

Insensitive . . . Imaginative . . . Speculative . . . WTF?

Am I that bad when all I did was to teach him somehow that life isnt all a bed of roses, that he needs to give up some little luxuries in life for the meantime just to be able to survive in the jungle of life? Am i being unfair when i deprived the hard earned peso for food just because i thought he need to know how it is to save money?

From the very beginning i have told him that i wont be dictating his life , i wont even be involve when it comes to his finances, he has all the freedom in the world to do what he wanted to do in his life as long as he wont compromise mine., that is the set up. I just let the way things go into its own way. Observing things the way it unravels from day to day. I kept my words, i wont hinder him as to what he wanted to do with his life, when he got his money, he went all the way to spend it like a millionaire, and at the end of it all it ended up asking me for food? WTF? I never give in anyway, but lately he has been into a sudden change of state. Well then i dont know how far he has gone in his way to millions , i dont even care about it anyway, one thing for sure, i am still wishing him to reach his goal of going here in cebu in the first place. I hope he didnt forget his main purpose of goin here. One last thing, hopefully, i hope i am just too imaginative and speculative on the way things are going... i hope... i hope...

God bless.

2008-06-20T21:36:00.000-08:00

Im Sorry But You dont Impressed me Much!

Why are people resort to daydreaming? ... is it because they can temporarily escape from the harsh reality of the world? or is it that they just wanted to create a new world of their own? or just to fulfill their fantasies? No harm in daydreaming i guess, nothings wrong about it... wrong comes when they tried to incorporate it into reality and becomes a lie.

Why do people have to lie then? to cover up for their weaknesses? to fool someone else? or just to impress the world !!?

Lies and hypocrisy may be the best thing that Jelson have mastered in his lifetime. Creating lies to take advantage of someone else, or simply telling lies just to make an impression that he indeed made a niche in this jungle of life.

When i was still in Davao, he went here in Cebu to have a new life as he claimed then, he was telling me he became a call center agent in one of the countless contact centers in metro cebu, an achievement indeed for someone who was only an internet attendant back in davao. I was happy for such achievement he made. No insecurity because i thought by then that he indeed deserve such.

It so happened that fate lead me to the queen city of the south, and also became part of the workforce in one of the prestigious call center around. Because of the new development, Jelson had to make a move and thus tried to penetrate in the company that i worked with, unfortunately he doesn't deserve to be in the company in the first place, beside his grammar that is flying everywhere, his communication skills is way below the standard of the company, thus he never succeeded in the process. What else then his next move be than to make people believe he got into a work in a company he thinks would outdo my current company.

Why is he doing this? why is he trying to compete with me when i myself is happy whatever his achievements would be?

Fate indeed made its move and discoveries comes one after another. For once he never became an agent in any contact center around. Give me your proof dude if you have one.... And the his current company, which he proudly showed his temporary ID, (well only the picture part, covering the name of the company) which later on i have discovered that indeed he is not a lexmark employee but just a lowly paid employee in one of the store in ayala center. Oh well its in ayala , thats the only thing that he was concise in his story. Accordingly a two month probationary employee who defended himself in the board meeting thats why he is being sent to Manila, something that his co.employee got envied to. What the heck man!?

Again, you never impressed me much dude! you got to make it more credible next time? but just an friendly advise, be true , be good and be gentle!

If you happen to read this one, you can actually disputes everything but give me a proof man and i will retract everything here. IF indeed you worked in a call center, show me your employment certificate, if you say you had an AWOL, show me your ID then... in that case i wont be getting any help from others to make my stories credible, im just putting every piece of the puzzle to complete my theory.

Just the same, i regret knowing you.... the greatest liar and hypocrite of all. You said im the worst among the worst that you've met, what else then can i call you? You said im a devil to your friend who happen to be with me as of the moment, then let it be. I really dont care if you convince him to get out and make a life outside from my world, id be happy if he can do that, at least i have done my part to help.

but then again, act to where you are situated. Dont pretend to be on someone else's level if you havent gone that far.

2008-04-06T03:01:00.000-08:00

Im Officially a Call boy Now

When the sudden turn of event prompted me to decide to seek for a greener pasture, i found myself here in cebu, a new place to explore, a new horizon to conquer. The new experience wasnt that as easy as it seemed to be. I thought everything's gonna be alright, everything will smoothly go into placed but it turned out the other way around.

I was then literally struglling during the first two months here, stretching every peso i have in my savings just to survive longer. I lived alone, and all the friends seemed to have forgotten me during those trying times. I even question if God is there. The struggles seemed endless and i was on my way of giving up, but there is this instinct in me that somehow along the way i could find my place here in cebu.

Days turned to weeks and weeks turned to months, still there was no sign of progress, i literally struggled emotionally and financially. Eventually im beginning to feel deteriorating.

As it happened, fate lead me to this trade that nowadays is very rampant. An abnormal life awaits me here, but i dared to belong.

Officially, last March 3, 2008, i became a call boy. Abnormal schedule as I will be working during night time and i used my daytime in bed. But with the less ordinary lifestyle it is, comes the perks associated with the job. Performance based it is. I earned more as i performed better, and literally im earning more than half of what i earned before.

With the above facts, im determined to be in this trade for quite a long time until i earned enough for me to live a more comfortable life.

At the end of the day, when my body is due to have its rest, i have made a niche in the industry that i learned to love...

Im a call boy... and im proud of being one...

Yeah... god bless your naughty mind...

"Thank you for reading, have a nice day!!!"

Now you know....

2008-01-11T03:12:00.000-08:00

Will it be Goodbye Davao?

Change is inevitable in one's life. It happen in a blink of an eye without you thinking about it or even in your wildest dreams it never occured. It could also be an anticipated event that somehow made you become ready of the twist of situation.

I ended my year 2007 but with a heavy heart for I have made a great decision to somehow leap on the another part of the country. A sudden unexpected turn out of fate's play happened and I have found myself waving goodbye for Metro Davao for the moment.

I greeted the new year with a bang at my hometown in Bohol. Another twist came into the picture last wednesday in the evening when I receive a call for an exam in the queen city of the south.

Eager. Anxious were some of the mixed emotions I had as the ship carried me last night going here. And there you go, I indulge myself in what have been a tiresome and stressful day ever i had for the year 2008.

First stop: a three part examination each would be a disqualifying round. The first part was so nervous breaking as it was tricky and kinda hard part. But we all 15 have passed. Second part made us smile as we scribbled our answers in a blink of an eye. Third part was a so-so part and then we were called one by one for the first interview. Each interview being a disqualifying round too. And at the end of the third interview, oh yes ! i managed to reached that far, i found myself alone with my comrades all have gone to nowhere.

Now I have just signed a contract for a 10 day program which will hopefully lead me to be officially part of the company i have applied to.

Good luck to me.

To God be the Glory

2007-12-16T23:40:00.000-08:00

I will Miss You Ron

I got a call early in the morning from Joan, Ronilio's wife saying that the latter was rushed to the hospital for immediate medication. I really didnt know that it was that serious, i just thought twas only something of a minor injury or something. It turned out to be our company driver Ronilio admitted to the intensive care unit at Davao medical Center.

I dont know exactly the diagnosis but as of my understanding, he was overdozed from drinking too much alcohol which affected his braincells. It can be recalled that yesterday December 16, 2007 was his birthday and a day before, thats saturday they were already enjoying over a bottle of redhorse here at the office all the way till night with Charles. I did not join them because i went to the midnight sale at the mall.

Yesterday i sent him an SMS message in the morning to greet him on his natal day. Accordingly, they were drinking the whole day that led to his hospitalization early this morning.

And now a bad news came into the office from our boss.

Ronilio is gone.

For once let me tell the whole world how this guy is being loved by everyone in the office.

He is the only person who understand every mood swing i may have. He is the only person that would change my mood. The only person that could put back the smile in my lips whenever im being cramped with loads of works and pressures.

For sure ill gonna miss this guy.

Ron I hope you will be happy to wherever you are.

Until Then

Dona Corazon Phenomenal Comeback

2007-12-14T15:16:00.001-08:00

Who never knew Doña Corazon vda de Berenguer, a popular character in the soap opera Maging Sino Ka Man ably portrayed by seasoned actress Chin Chin Guttierez... And now with the book 2 of the series... she never failed to get into the spotlight...!

2007-11-25T23:30:00.000-08:00

STOW AWAY

I thought that my saturday night would be just another typical night back at home. When i went out from the office, twas around 5:30 in the afternoon. When i reach home, i got a message from Charles. FYI this guy is on stowaway since thursday for reasons we dont know about. He asked to borrow for a money because accordingly he's very hungry.

Out of my curiosity to know his reasons for doing it, and also my being a kind hearted fellow especially to someone who became close to my heart back at work, i fetched him up at Roxas.

Gone were the stylish Charles that i know of. Gone were the baby Carlos' great aura that i became a fan of back at work. Donning his yellow polo shirt, he approached me and gave me a tight hug with a wry smile. A smile that symbolized tiredness and emptiness. I smell liquor on his breath.

"Why are you doing this?" was all i could utter as I embraced him once more.
"Im tired of my life, I am not happy anymore, i want to be set free, i want to go back to Manila" the very first lines he uttered.

If thats what you want then why the hell you are doing this, why not speak your mind out... Thats what i told him as we were looking for a place to dine in. In our walk, we passed by Malativas Restaurant in Bonifacio, there we go, had our dinner.

After the dinner we sang our hearts out over a bottle of Red Horse. Yeah we did sing even if our voices were as bad as you can imagine. At the other table were groups of friends who were all good singers but still we manage to get our own doze of fun with our songs. I remember we sang together Wherever you will Go, Say That You Love Me and other couple of songs. People were giving us an unusual stares with our unusual sweetness together. Oh well damn naughty people's mind.

We then headed to their house to drop something there and off we walk by the empty streets along Villamor. With our woobly walk and dizzy mindsets, he was holding me up shoulder to somehow get a balance, while i was just supporting my other should unto his back oh well butt it is. Haha the butt that i got envy with. Wishing it was mine. A perfect butt indeed. Anyway, along our way a habal habal passed by where we got a ride. On our ride he was starting to kiss me over my neck then to my ears. Oh uh what the hell is he doing!? Then i tried to stop him as i look at him but i was stunned as his lips touched mine. I dont know what to do, i just thought it might be a great adventure to be kissing someone riding a motorcycle along the streets of metro davao, and to top it all he is a HE. Imagine the adventure. Oh yes, i gave back the kisses as we savour the sweetness of this saliva exchange act that is so called torrid kiss....

.... i woke up in my birthday suit in an unfamiliar territory. Charles wasnt with me anymore, he have flown to nowhere. I am in room 422 of Sampaguita Inn. HUH. What the hell happened last night?!?

AS OF THIS WRITING... Baby Carlos isnt home yet, he is not communicating with me either... I just wish him all the best

November 25, 2007 in All about life's ir

2007-11-22T21:15:00.000-08:00

ONE MORE CHANCE

I watched the movie One More Chance last night at Gaisano Mall here in Metro Davao and i just cant help but appreciate the in-depth acting of its main stars John Lloyd Cruz and Bea Alonzo so with the supporting casts like Dimples Romana and the beautiful Maja Salvador. Even newbie star like PBB season 2 big winner Bea Saw gave nice performance considering her being a neophyte in acting.

Anyway aside from the acting, the story too is weaved neatly and was presented a comic manner but sensible enough to tickle your emotions when the situation arises. Credit to its director for polishing the film in a way not to let the audience sleep off their seat.

Most noticeably were the great lines from the characters that bound to be a classic in the years to come.

FROM POPOY TO BASHA:
Mahal na mahal pa rin kita... kahit masakit na!!!

That line coming from John Lloyd's character ably portrayed by him through the help of his pleading almond eyes struck me first in that movie. I could never fathom the depth of the emotion he showed but one thing for sure, the line is very true. There would come a time in your life that no matter how hurt you are you still had the hope that one day all the pains will be worth it and in the process you continue loving and yet you are in pain.

FROM BASHA TO POPOY
ako naman ang ay gusto nito diba? bakit ang sakit sakit? ang totoo umaasa pa rin ako na sasabihin mo sa akin na ako pa rin, ako na lang, ako na lang ulitt

The hope that you are still the one in someone elses heart is but a torture in itself. Will I have the courage to do the same act? huh...

FROM POPOY TO BASHA
She loved me at my worst, you had me at my best... but you chose to break my heart

Borrowing from popoy's words to his friend rick, siguro nawawala sa atin ang mga minamahal natin ng totoo dahil alam ng diyos na may bagong darating na mamahalin tayo. When someone broke your heart it doesnt mean its the end of everything, its just a start of a new beginning, but we cant help but look at how the relationship went over the years and it will end it that very moment, its a mix emotion, but as i said, theres someone taking over.

FROM KRIZZY TO BASHA
if kaya pang ausin pipilitin, but if this is really what both of you need then just be strong. magiging mahirap at masakit pEro hopefully all the pain will be worth it.

If a relationship is going nowhere, a mediator should be there at least give shed on the gray areas of the situation, and if it wont be fixed then its time to say goodbye... How could bear the pain of saying goodbye? huh!

FROM MARK TO BASHA
"dont feel sorry for loving yourself a little bit more?"

But how can i not be sorry if the small space intended for loving myself more became a universal space to roam around and in the process i lost and found another mortals but still the heart belongs to someone whom i lost my sight with... HOW?

The well executed scene for me the entirety of the movie is when Trisha felt its time to let go of Popoy because she knew deep within her that the latter still has a feeling for Basha

TRISHA: Mahal mo ba ako ?
POPOY: OO naman
TRISHA: Mahal mo ba sya?
POPOY: Ayaw kitang makitang masasaktan
Trisha put her hands to Popoys eyes and let it close
TRISHA: para hindi mo makita kung sakaling masasaktan ako... Mahal mo ba sya?
With eyes close, in very heartwarming acting ever portrayed by John Lloyd cruz for Popoys character
POPOY: Im sorry trisha...

then trisha shed tears that broke my very own heart... I was teary eyed. haha. that would make me less of a man for some, but i dont care less.

I would like to end this entry with a line from trisha

"KUNG TAPOS NA ANG LAHAT, SANA TATAPUSIN NA NATIN... DAHIL ANG SAKIT SAKIT NA..."

Lobo Trailer! - Angel Locsin AND Piolo Pascual

2007-11-18T16:53:00.001-08:00

The very first trailer of the much awaited teleserye of Angel Locsin together with Piolo Pascual after the former transfered from GMA7 to ABSCBN. Is this project worth her transfer considering that she was then the queen in the kapuso network primetime block? Much to be seen for this seemingly interesting project. Many loved the teaser, hopefully they can sustain the interest of the viewing public comes the actual exhibition of this on primetime of ABSCBN...

2007-10-25T18:02:00.000-08:00

GMA Pardons Erap

And so the Philippines made again a new chapter in its fledgling democracy as the most powerful person in the land granted an executive pardon to the deposed president who was convicted of plunder.

The recent turn around of this political bruhahaha has stunned the filipinos anew and some questioned the perfect timing of the presidential pardon.

Is this being use to divert the attention of the filipino people from the issues that the current administration is facing? The broadband deal isn't finish yet, and the glorietta bombing has been pinpointed to the administration plot, courtesy of Senator Trillanes. The political killings might not be in the papers nowadays but still its an unresolved issues concerning the PGMA presidency and so does a couple of other scandals and controversy.

Now going back to the pardon, several groups are protesting. Ex president Fidel V. Ramos isnt happy about it. A group called of NOPE ( NO Pardon for Erap) movement has voice out its sentiments over the issue, the MBC (Makati Business club) is airing its disagreement, but then what can they do? The president has already given the pardon and was already handed down through her official spokeperson, its now on the erap camp to take the pardon to make it official.

At the end of the day i could personally see a motive behind this gesture of the president. This woman president is all set to make her stay until 2010 on her seat and she's doing everything she could do to make it a reality. And perhaps this is one of her way of ensuring it. Besides, giving a pardon to the deposed president would mean that her presidency is legitimate as only the president has the power to give the pardon, and so it does happen now , erap is already technically accepting the legitimacy of the Arroyo government, much to the big grin of the palace!!! They won the battle afterall.

The senate drama, an abrupted impeachment, the eviction of Estrada from Malacanang Palace, the rise of power of the second woman president, the trial of the century of Estrada, the conviction of the ex president for plunder, and now the executive clemency , whats next to this unending political drama?

Where will the Philippines go?

Juan de la Cruz alam mo pa ba ang nangyayari sa iyong bansa?

2007-10-23T16:21:00.000-08:00

The week that was

Even the frequent outpouring of rains during night times in the metro did not stop my adventures and misadventures the last week. ONly now did i realized that the past week was a bit of a full load of different personas and adventures we were on.

I startted the week with a birthday celebration. Hehe no i am not the one celebrating my natal day, it was someone else, i opted to attend the celebration than to accept Harry's invitation to have a drinking spree with his cousins and a couple of other guys at Jacinto.

Tuesday came and i just learned that LR comes home here in Davao. Off from his work in Manila as he is now connected with the Ayala Foundation. Its been years since i have seen this friend of mine whom we calls each other "baby brow". Well then i went up to his room to fetched him up for another round of boys night out. And to add spice to our night, we invited harry to join us which the latter gladly accepted and before we knew it, there he came in his casual attire. huh!

It was in wednesday that i told myself to relax since its been two straight nights of alcohol controlled body haha. But then I have to be with Jong to have some sort of relief, alcohol free night. And it was indeed a relaxing night for me.

Friday came and movies was our trip. Along with Harry , Jairus and Jhun we headed to SM cinema and catch the movie "the seeker" . The movie was kinda boring one but we managed to stay till the very end. And liven up our spirit, we headed to pink and blue bar in Rizal promenade for our videoke and drinking sessions. The singing champions we were as we dominated the bar anew.

Away from the sights and sounds of the bar, we opted to feel a sense of serenity at the seawall where we had a great conversation about life under the moonlit sky with the ghostly sea witnessing our exhausted souls.

A hot coffee at Dunkin Donuts in San Pedro was our final destination before we call it a night er a day!

And to capped the weeklong adventures with a bang, we invaded Kaputian beach in Samal for an overnight fun. Its triple b treat there...bodies , beer and oh uh the beach... oh well let me add another B... but its better left unsaid...

2007-10-12T17:33:00.000-08:00

WOWowee

Yesterday, i had a chance to catch some daytime television programs since it was a holiday. One particular program that caught me up hooking on the boobtube is the controversial noontime show Wowowee. How is it doing after the "technical glitch" that occurred.

Well, its business as usual for the show. It started with its usual high note of music fun and laughters. A dance revolution with the dance royalties and then a "beat that" portion where the dancers displayed tricks and stunts competing each other. Obviously the more popular tandem of Luningning and Mariposa got the nod of the viewers. Afterwhich they acknowledge each set of studio audience positioned round the studio with the female co host as well as the popular dancers doing the hosting chores. The fun continued with their Sayaw Darling segment, looking for studio audience who can show their dancing er comic skills to get the nod of Willie to be part of the "Bigaten"

After the opening extravaganza, comes another phase of the show, in their first game segment called Willie of Fortune, it features father and son or daughter / mother and son / daughter tandem who happen to have the same birthday. In this segment, a sudden change emotion will occur as the viewers are treated into a rollercoaster of emotions. One time you will cry as the contestants share life's cruelty and in an instant you will laugh at their tactfullness especially those children when asked about their message to their parent. One kid ask her mother to let her play outside, such a humble request that made the entire studio burst into laughter at the same time , amused with the kid's simplicity and candidness.

The same portion is stretched too long that in the end you will lose your concentration especially with that unholy hour wherein your eyes beg to close for an afternoon nap.

All in all, i would still choose to watch this program over the other noontime show precisely because it showcases ordinary lives that in one way or the other became an inspiration to everyone. The show gave you the total entertainment possible.

You call me cheap. okay, but then i would still be a wowowee fanatic!!!

2007-10-09T19:23:00.000-08:00

ENGAGE

jay im engage!!! ... kaw ang una ako gisultian...

that was a part of jasmin's (aka raye) message to me the other night. A mix reaction came into my senses as i read the message. The memoirs of the past suddenly brought back into my mind and without me knowing i was keying my phone with my friend jong sitting behind reading my message...

Whose the lucky guy? and she eagerly replied... Si Eugene gud. Oh well they survived afterall with there shaky relationship.

She added that she isnt sure of her decision and was asking if she has been right since she is already on the right age.

"Here i am again, im not sure of myself, and still its you whom i confided with"

I was advising her that if she really love the guy then she should go what her hearts tells her. She has a stable job already, i dont know about the guy , i hardly knew him, but then again, the fact that they survived this far means something, so i urged her to do what her hearts desired.

In the course of our message exchange she said...

"Of course part ka na sa buhay ko. Di na mausob pa. Unya di masyadong halata na a special ka , mao gani la naku gi.schedule ug june kay basin matinga ka na dili ikaw ang groom..."

Hahha.. still the same raye that she is... i wish her all the best...

Congratulations jasmin... you too will always be a part of me.

Is Cory Aquino a slut?

2007-10-05T16:29:00.001-08:00

Just after "Desperate Houswives" slur on medical school in the philippines, another joke which does not fit to the filipinos spread like a wildfire over the internet. The Daily Show features about america being ready for a woman president, and in the feature were a list of women leaders in the country including Cory Aquino where they put a SLUT remark on the photo of the former president.

Christian Bautista: Lupang Hinirang Blooper

2007-09-17T17:33:00.001-08:00

A sorry performance for the asia's pop idol Christian Bautista... He missed a line on end part as he sang the Philippine national anthem. Too bad... But what is admirable for him is that he handled the situation professionally with much confidence as he vow down to the people in the arena...and later on apologizes to the filipino on air as he was interviewed by a news reporter... Good luck Christian!!!

2007-09-12T16:44:00.000-08:00

Guilty

And so the Philippines once again made another first in its history as it convicted a former president to a life imprisonment!!!

Yesterday, the special division of the Sandigan Bayan had given its verdict after six years of trial for plunder and perjury against the deposed president Joseph Ejercito Estrada also known as ERAP along with his son Jinggoy and Atty Serapio among others.

Erap was acquitted of the charges of perjury so with Jinggoy and Atty Serapio for plunder but the erstwhile president of the republic was convicted for plunder in the criminal case 26558 and was sentenced to a reclusion perpetua.

The 70 year old former president was quoted saying the court was created to convict him while his lawyers were bringing along with them a book of famous trials saying that a special court is a victor's justice, meaning all cases which were under a special court, a conviction was given sighting from the time of Jesus down to the present times.

But the stockmarket has made a positive move right after the conviction. Peso gains ground against dollars signifying confidence of investors again in the Philippines after this turmoil...

While the showbiz has been giving moral support for Erap, a low turn out of pro Erap supporters were there at the SandiganBayan, about 400 contrary to the expected 4,000 says one thing or another.

At the end of the day, what is positive about this page in history is that, we have shown to the world, the no one is above the law!!!

God bless the philippines.

2007-08-31T20:49:00.000-08:00

Beauty Pageant Boo-Boos

Host: What was the very first gift that you gave to your girlfriend?
Male Contestant: Uhmm... taptoy.
Host: What taptoy?
Male Contestant: Taptoy na teddy bird.

Host: What's your ideal age for marriage?
Girl: Uhmm... I am not sure...
Host: Hindi... Kunwari ikaw, more or less...?
Girl: Uhmm... more.
(crowd booing...)
Sige, Sige... Less, less

Host: If you had a foreigner friend, where will you bring him to
showcase the beauty of the Philippines?
Girl Contestant: Bocaue.
Host: Bocaue...? Why Bocaue?
Girl: Because it's a magnificent place.
Host: Which part of Bocaue?
Girl: The Bocaue Rice Terraces.
(Banawe kaya 'yon!)

Host: Who's your favorite author?
Contestant: Danielle Steele.
Host: Why Danielle Steele?
Contestant: Because... because Danielle Steele, I like best. Thank
you.

Host: How would you like me to address you?
Contestant: My address is Project 8, Quezon City.

Host: What is your best feature?
Contestant: My graduation feature.

Host: So tell us, why did you join this contest?
Contestant: Me? Join this contest? Why did I... That's all. Thank you!

Host: What do you want to be after you graduate?
Contestant: I want to be a successful Medicine.

Host: Hindi ito boob... hindi ito tube... Pero tinatawag itong
boobtube. Ano ito?
Contestant: BRA!

Host: What would you like to say to foreigners?
Contestant: Please come back.

Host: What is your typical day?
Contestant: I think Saturday po!

(Gay Contest)
Host: Ano ang advantage mo sa ibang contestant?
Gay Contestant: I think and believe na bilang isang bading...
(pause)
...Ano nga po ulit yung question?

Host: Which part of your body is your best asset?
Contestant: (believe it or not she answered) ...Si Melanie Marquez po!

Host: What is your favorite motto?
Contestant: (after a long pause) I don't have a motto eh.
(so the crowd starts helping her out. the crowd started saying, "Time is
gold! Time is gold!")
Contestant: I have na po. Chinese gold!

Host: If you were to describe the color blue to a blind person, how
would you do it?
Contestant: That's a very good question. Keep it up. (then the girl
turns and walks away.)

Host: Who is your favorite fictional character?
Girl: JOSE RIZAL! (crowd starts laughing.)
Host: Who is your favorite hero then?
Girl: Hulk Hogan.

Host: If you were to become a superhero, what would your power be?
Girl Contestant: Uhmm... bumble bee!

Host: What is your edge over the other contestants?
Girl Contestant: My edge is 23 years old.

Host: What, in your opinion, is the ideal age for marriage?
Girl: Between 24 and 25!

Host: How do you see yourself 10 years from now?
Girl: I'll be 28.

Host: Describe your special someone in three words.
Girl: Kahit nga po 1 word, kaya ko.
Host: Ok, sige...
Girl: In one word... MY LIFE!

Host: If you were given any special power, what would it be?
Girl: Power of Attorney!

Host: So you like reading, who's your favorite author?
Girl: Uhmm, Shakespeare.
Host: What works of Shakespeare?
Girl: Hindi ko po alam eh.
Host: But he's your favorite...?
Girl: Eh... kasi patay na sya eh.

Host: What is the biggest problem facing the youth today?
Girl:Drugs.
Host: Why?
Girl: Mahal eh!

Host: Hey, I heard you almost didn't make it, how did you get here?
Did you ride or did you walk?
Gay Contestant: Of course, did you ride. What do you think of me, did
you walk?

Wowowee Controversy Explanation

2007-08-24T21:09:00.001-08:00

A video that may somehow give light to the recent "scam" on the noontime show WOWOWEE over ABSCBN... We hope staff will soon give their side so that speculations of scam will be explained and eliminated thereafter...

Manny Poohquiao

2007-08-15T20:19:00.001-08:00

Impersonator of Filipino boxer Manny Pacquiao as seen on the tv show WOWOWEE on ABS-CBN2

2007-08-10T20:14:00.000-08:00

LIKE A VIRGIN

Last night, i received a message on my mobile telling me that smart unlimited text service is back, and true enough i manage to register even if it was beyond 5pm cut-off time.

To make use or say abuse the unlimited service, i forwarded a message to everyone on my phonebook with something like this:
"If youre given a chance to ask me one controversial question , what would it be"

The responses were enourmous with random questions that includes safe questions like

sino ka date mo ngayon (who is your date now)

to some inane questions like why a building is called as such when it is already built? there is even a response that says... "did you love me?" , that coming from someone i just meet once. hehe

All throughout the responses, there have been quite a few controversial and mischievous questions being thrown unto me... Questions like

Are you gay?
May experience ka na ba? ( Do you already have an experience?),
Naga fuck ka ba? (Do you fuck?) the question being referred to as sex with the same sex.

One predominant question of all which i was caught offguard was the question of virginity....

Virgin ka pa ba? ( Are you still a virgin?)
Sino nakadivirginize sa yo (Who divirginize you?)
Pwede ba kitang i divirginize (Can i divirginize you?)
What age did you lost your virginity...

These questions brought me back to my high school days where i first had this so called sex...

shivering ... anxious ... afraid... mixed emotions of a boy whose eyes glowed in horror as the predator feasted on his innocent raw body...

Just one of the things found on my closet... hahayzzzzzzzzzz

OUR MAID IMELDA from ON THE TELEVISION Series

2007-08-02T17:21:00.001-08:00

Watch this video clip spoofing former philippines first lady Imelda Marcos... This is hilarious, very good for starting your day with a laugh...

Filipino Prisoners are back: Jumbo Hotdog!

2007-07-27T22:01:00.001-08:00

Cant get enough of the filipino prisoner's groove...heres another clip for you

RADIO GAGA

2007-07-27T22:00:00.001-08:00

Who says prisoner cant do good... think again... look at this video that rock the entire world in awe...worthy to be part of guiness world record

Sister Act

2007-07-27T21:59:00.003-08:00

Prisoners in Cebu City do the sister Act... Pretty amusing!!! watch the vids folks

Prison Thriller

2007-07-27T21:59:00.001-08:00

See this awesome video,,,proudly pinoy!!!

ironic97ooo

2007-07-13T16:26:00.003-08:00

Kanipaan Drive where we rock and roll with the music.......

ironic97oo

2007-07-13T16:26:00.001-08:00

Kanipaan Drive Happy Nights with the Ironic Batch 97 to capped the first day of our week long reunion

ironic97o

2007-07-12T20:23:00.001-08:00

Holy Mass - Floating Restaurant - Busai Falls - Loktob Swimming and Kanipaan Drive videoke

Day 1 of our Panagtapok 2007

ironic97a

2007-07-12T19:34:00.001-08:00

as we invaded pamilacan island

ironic97b

2007-07-12T19:33:00.001-08:00

pamilacan island invasion

ironic97

2007-07-12T19:11:00.001-08:00

Panagtapok 07 day 2

2007-06-28T21:59:00.000-08:00

PBB HOKUS POKUS

The current season of the reality tv show Pinoy Big brother is now into its final days... or it could be the whole franchise might be in its final run because of the controversies the show got in the entirety of its second season run.

ONE particular controversy involved the so called "favorite" of the show's business head. INfamous of her tactless yet without breeding comments and reaction after the face to face nomination , housemate wendy got the ire of the viewing public and everywhere in pbb forums, hate mails and spam mails circulated like a wildfire. It can be recalled that this housemate was already evicted from the house but was returned, no thanks, to their "BALIK BAHAY" twist.

The subscribers of PBB 24/7 on the net are also complaining because two cameras being livestreamed online always focuses on wendy adding to the already built up notion that this housemate is big brother's favorite.

One eviction put the viewers in rage when a public darling housemate nel became a sacrificial lamb to 'save' housemate wendy. Comparing the status of the two, the former being loved by the masses because of his sense of humor and good attitude while the latter, being hated for her uncalled for behavior, who would not raised their eyebrows to hell when Nel was voted out in favor of wendy?

Then last night was the night everyone was looking forward to. Everyone hoped that of the five remaining housemate, surely wendy will be eliminated from the big 4. But the final eviction was the other way around. The showbiz son "Bodie" was evicted and wendy again was safe and became part of season 2's BIG four.

The people at the eviction hall were shouting 'WENDY LABAS WENDY" (out wendy out) showing their disagreement on the latest turn of event.

Now that wendy is part of the big four, a possibility of her emerging as the big winner is not a a farfetched scenario. The fans are crossing their fingers and are hoping she wont win or else, legions of followers of the pbb might nowhere to be found in the next season of the show if there would be...

A "booo" for wendy is in the offing comes the big night at the big dome. Something to look forward to...

as of now, we just have to sigh...

One Piece Opening 1-6

2007-06-27T00:46:00.001-08:00

2007-06-26T18:35:00.001-08:00

A Million Thanks to You

Barely a week after i celebrated my birthday, I would like to thank the people who have remembered and sent their greetings and well wishes.

To my aunt te dadz and ate tita, to my cuzn shoy, debi and dian and to my sister , thank you ...

From the ironic community
To alkim, for the being first one to greet. Thank you very much. You will always be special.
To Rosal, my everydearest, all time partner in every dance during my elementary years, thank you very much girl, thank you again for the board shorts...
To Jo Stephen, thank you do. you woke me up in the morning just to greet and ask for redhorse, you made me smile...
To my everdearest cathy, you rock girl!!!
To the beautiful dayen, thank you for the messages, for the long midnight txt hehehe, that somehow became my sleeping pills
To my bedimpled friend Mark Michael, thank you very much
To the ironic girls, the sexy mayella, ate che, to the demure yet sensual gracey, to the now grown up tweety jhazmin, to chie, to stella, to a good fellow marlan, my kababayan jake, to the strictly elegant maam emily, to momie cata extend my hugs to baby marga, to my bohol partner in crime sam thank you very much for the company, thank you ironics for making me special... you are the best...as your common words..."TAGAY NA"

From the office
To Rose, to ronie, to the outrageously handsome hehe charles and of course to sir tonton, sir nelson thank you... and to maam christy for cooking the lunch and for the sumptuous afternoon snack complete with ice cream...thanks so much

from the friendster world...
to my all time favorite jelson, for the message and for everything ...you know you will always have a special place in my heart... good luck in everything you do... see you around.
to shoti, for the greetings...
again to dayen , mak mak and rosal... thanks ironics
and also to jaime for the unexpected message....
to neil john...thank you.
and to raye for still remembering my day....

from the yahoo messenger...
thanks to Sir allan george of Johnny Air, to Christian Andrew

to Dondie Mark, thank you.

And to all those whom i failed to mention, thank you very much... i love you all...

2007-04-23T21:02:00.001-08:00

The Philippines in the world!

The tv reality phenomenon in the world had conquered the philippines way back in 2005. And now the phenomenon is back with the season 2 of Pinoy Big brother, a franchise of the hit reality show from Endemol. Its current season boast of different twists and highlights that made filipinos hooked to the boobtube and even others had their 24/7 on the net and skycable. Just this week, a new twist spins off in the show via the big brother swap, a housemate from the pinoy big brother is being traded for a week from a housemate in Big brother slovenia. Who would not feel excited about the clashing of two cultures in two different houses. The basketball hunk of Pinoy big brother is being traded with a commercial hottie from big brother slovenia. With this swap, the world has been interested with pinoy big brother, thus, yahoo buzz index recorded PBB as the number 1 on the list of yahoo searches for scandal. Unfortunately they would only get a few of it as PBB is not as liberated as its counterpart in other countries

Feast on bruce !!!

2007-04-16T16:38:00.000-08:00

The Philippine Midterm Elections is fast approaching. May 14, 2007 is the day that will test if the Administration candidates (Unity Ticket) under Pres. Gloria Macapagal Arroyo still have the charisma to win the support of the Filipino people. The Opposition candidates (Grand Opposition) are putting their best guards in front to stop the Unity Ticket from winning.

Who will survive? Who will be in the final magic 12 come election day?The answer depends on us!I made a video featuring the 24 Senatorial candidates. It is the Unity Ticket vs. the Grand Opposition.

Please support my drive to help inform the Filipino voters about the kind of public servants they are hoping to place in the Senate. Please spread the video by posting it in your blog.As my gesture of thanks to you for the support, I will give out a little reward at the end of April (I am thinking of a nice gift). My apology, though, I can only afford one person. That lucky person shall be drawn by lot from all the names who participated by posting the video.

From TalkSmart

--
Posted By Pinoy Scoopery to Jawo's Pinoy Scoopery - SCOOPS and SPOOFS of BLOGS at 4/16/2007 03:53:00 AM __._,_.___

2007-02-14T20:20:00.000-08:00

Stressful valentines

Weeks of planning and preparation, reservation, only to end up cancelling every plan that i have come up with... what could be worst than that?

After office, i had to drop by at Mark's apartment to spend the remaining hours before Reign could finally arrived Davao. After a tremendous work at the office, i was caught in a traffic jammed streets going to Sandawa! huh!!

After decades of waiting, Reign had finally arrived, so i get out from Mark's apartment when the rain started pouring in... tsk tsk... I managed to get into a "tricykad" that brought me to the main highway where i jumped off right away into the semi-empty vehicle without checking its route. It turned out to be i was boarding the wrong jeepney... grrrrrrr

Well then i had to transfer to another jeep and travel towards SM. I was expecting Reign to be there already but it turned out she wasnt there yet. Huh! I had to call her thrice before she could answer her phone...

IN any rate after weve been stucked in the traffic again we finally dined at Cups ( i hope i got the name right haha) along F Torres street. A resto complete with band that serenades its diners...

Well all wells that ends well as they say... i dozed off to sleep just a minute after I reach home... Now im back to work... SEe yah....

2007-01-31T20:42:00.000-08:00

Falling leaves

I remember a long time ago, i received a forwarded message asking whose to blame when a leaf fall out from a tree... Is it the wind that blow it away? Is it the leaf that failed to hold on tight or is it the tree that let go of the leaf...

Come to think of it, its an analogous situation tantamount to human friendship. As they say, people come and go in our lives, its up to us how we handle their stay or how we cope up with their departure.

Bringing back the setting on my own life's avatar, i have been into such. A roller coaster ride with people who just come up unexpectedly and without any reason they also had vanish just the same. This lead me thinking, is there something wrong with me? Why is it, that the exit comes just in time when i have invested emotional attachment to the growing friendship that i learned to love. Or could this be just one of the so called fate's cruel play.

Whatever are the answer to all these questions, one thing is for sure, another day will come and i shall meet new face to somehow share a journey with. and the past shall be buried in the pith of my heart.

2007-01-14T20:07:00.000-08:00

Starting the year right

Yes at last i got some precious time to sit in front of the computer and key in some thoughts to start my blogging for the year 2007. My new year was celebrated in a simple way with my family and relatives. Then im back to work a day after.

Its been quite some times since i posted a blog entry here, I can think of something to write here, nothings new with my life, well I watched the movie ERAGON last night at SM and my review is written on the review section of my profile.

Anyway, before ill continue my journey for 2007, let me thank the people who were there during my voyage for 2006. Of course my family were there but here a special thanks to some people not related by blood

I would like to personally thank my good friend borj for the friendship, and now as we separate our journey i hope you will be happy to where you will be going! good luck.

Thanks to my {sic} baby Chino for the companionship thru good times and er bad times(?). And as you continue your life ahead, possibly without me guiding on, i knew you can make it wherever you may be. Just be true, be good and be gentle.

To my good friend harry who is still there amidst everything that happened in my life, you just dont know how i am grateful of having a friend like you bro.

To the rest of the sangreal clan members, who once upon a time joined me in my quest for a life that i desired to have, continue rockin on. We may now differ in views but as i always reiterated in the past, dont be fooled by the moods i wear, coz deep inside i truly care!

To my good friend ryan, who simply get me out from being stranded from nowhere. Thank you bro, unbeknown to you that you made a heroic deed from putting me to where i am now. I just hope we could spend another year or years to live by the promises of friendship that only both of us have mastered.

To mark, a new found friend who shall be leaving hopefully this first quarter of the year to a foreign land to find his place under the sun, thank you for the friendship and you will always be remembered. Good luck and may the best of luck be with you as you deserved it.

And to my girl Reign, whom i may have foresaken at times, im very sorry. I have not been the boyfriend material that a woman in you had longed for, but my love for you will always be in my heart. I LOVE YOU HoNEY.

May the year of the pig fires up each of our lives with a heat of good luck and more blessings.

2006-11-16T21:10:00.000-08:00

Friends cycle

The only constant in this world is change. And so they say. People come and go in our lives. For whatever purpose they deem served in our lives we must be thankful that once upon a time in their journey, they stop and sit with us and share their lives with. Memories are the only living remembrance of how great or how wonderful life could be with them.

When someone go, someone comes along to replace the emptiness. Far better than the one that went away.

Last night i met a stranger. He is ryan. A total stranger whom i knew and blended myself with. Perhaps its the lifestory that we both have the inter connect us in one point of our lives. Though stranger from each other, we managed to open up the book of our lives as we took dinner together. He is the guy that you cant traced any boastfullness despite possessing such magnificent handsome aura. Blessed with those pleading eyes and a lovable face decorated by a smile that spells everything, he still has the down to earth attitude.

We celebrated our friendship into a memorable night of intimate , intellectual and endearing encounter into the depth of the night. Going into the past turmoils in our lives and how we handle it added the hotness of human emotions sharing the beauty of the night of friendship and beyond.

"Slip ka na bro?" that was his message after a few minutes we separated ways. WE did had another round of exchange of messages as if we never had the chance to talk earlier in the night.

2006-10-10T23:28:00.000-08:00

Hang on!? or let go

When i was a little kid, i fell from a tree... but i managed to hold on to a branch... i was up there for a long time and waited...the silence, the pain in my arms, the blood pumping in my ears,...then i fell... i couldnt remember what happened when i hit the ground, all i could remember was the agony of holding on and the wonderful feeling of letting go. Its painful to hang on and wait for nothing. At times we should learn to give way and let go, we just got to move on.

They say we have to master the art of letting go, yet how could it be?! Its easy said than done. For the heart refuses what the mind is thinking. They just cant be synchronized that easy. Hahay. What a dilemma it would be.

It all started with my controversial blog, Kaibigan Usap Tayo, a lot of readers had been intrigued with it. I got series of reactions from friends and even from strangers in the friendster world. One particular reaction lead to an opening of the angst and pains that is brought by this so called love.

There comes a time when you meet someone and felt that s/he will be the person that you gonna share your entire life with. And yes i meet her. With my past brought to the realm of forgetfullness, i somehow manage to create a new vision of my tomorrow with a girl whom i loved very much. Though i never felt the love was reciprocated on its level of intensity, still blinded by the strong emotion.

And now it has slowly fade to nothingness, there is still the love, yes i must admit, i was going madly crazy inlove. My life is never been the same again. The strength that i got with the once blooming relationship had weaken as the days gone by. Im sorry but i just fall in love, and it is not a sin to fall.

Many of us believe that love is forever, that love never dies, only to be disillusioned in the end when we find our hands empty and our hearts longing. We mistakenly have looked at love as a need to be fulfilled, but love is only a gift given to us, we should not hold it in our hands for we may never find the strength to let it go when it decides to leave. We should only embrace its warmth and glow while it lasts and then freely open our arms when its time to say goodbye.

As long as there is no final words of goodbye. A little hope sprouts from my innermost being telling me that everything will gonna be fine. AFterall its much better to say, "hang on" than to say goodbye. :(

POSCRIPT:

Sometimes it's better to have forgiven and forgotten than never to have argued at all
for these are the things that build your ccharacter
that strengthen your love
and enlarge your capacity to love and be loved, many words cause many pains
sometimes the pain doesn't heal so easily
but it is part of building , of growing, of living and loving, I saw a picture and got that she was wrong but it will still be better for you to try to be friends again and act in love
then she can take it or leave it but you willhave made the right choice
it will all work out for good somehow
she is making choices still so it as of now undetermined, but very soon all will be revealed

FROM a good friend Fe Aurora

2006-08-28T23:24:00.001-08:00

Inuman, anyone?

Yesterday at 4pm while hallucinating at the office (hahaha, just had nothing to do then) i received a group message coming from Harry asking for a drinking spree. Hmmm here he is again, i bet its again about the cupid's world. Hahay gugma na jud na bay.

So there we go, we set a date later in the evening for a shot the world of liquors. Hmmm coming from the office I went straight to UM bolton and fetched him up. Clad in a stripe shirt with the usual backpack bag. He look stunningly great with the way he carries himself but the smile failed to hide the sorrow that those eyes held. He really was having a different aura, though still jolly he is not the same Harry that i knew and have shared the nights with in the past.

Twas only past six when we headed ourselves to Ilustre area looking for a perfect place to drain the bottles of beer. Since Pidoks was still bright as a morning sun, we decided to have our drinking session at shop and store where dimly lit place outside could be our domain of heartaches and misfortunes.

Bottles of redhorse were there witnessing two mortals as they tried to open up the burden deep within. And yes! my hunch is right. Its the effing love thingy that created that unusual sadness on his loving eyes.

We tried to lighten up the mood but we failed, those laughters served as a camouflage of the hurtings deep within. He is in love again. And again he is loving the wrong person. Or it could be he is loving the person at the wrong time. To add insult to the injury, the person he loved, loves someone else, and to make things worst, that someone else is part of our group! whew! Whatta complicated love triangle!

Every now and then, Harry would be looking in nothingness which i would abruptly disrupts his uncalled for emotional outburst. As bottles were down after the other, the wozzy duo were still going on fighting the emotional burden sharing in between takes the angst and pains of love. Hahay.Our nauseous state had caused to break some empty bottles which the incharge quickly called our attention and told us that we gonna pay for the damage. When asked about the amount, he told us that it cost us P3.00 per bottle, Harry then burst into a one big sinister laugh. Hmmm. with the "tatak sangre" remarks... CHIck!

Then we ended our night via a steaming hot encounter... BERI LAPS mode....

Isang inuman lang pala.... HARRY REMARKS....

2006-08-28T23:24:00.000-08:00

Inuman, anyone?

Then we ended our night via a steaming hot encounter... BERI LAPS mode....

Isang inuman lang pala.... HARRY REMARKS....

2006-08-25T16:57:00.000-08:00

TERRIBLE MISTAKE

The other night Chino called up at home asking for company. And he did went to our house to fetch me up. During our conversation, something came up unexpectedly. It was Jelson's message. It struck me a bit, but i dont know it just passed away from my mind since the night was centered on Chino, afterall he was the one asking for the company. He was in a very low esteem confidence yet brave as he is, he tried to squeeze every bit of his innermost energy to somehow keep the spirit alive to move on.

Last night, Chino forwarded to me the exact message Jelson send to him, which refers to me and here is a part of it.

".... i faced a terrible mistake of knowing him"

I just woke up from sleep when i read the message. It was around 8:00 pm where people at home were glued on the sineserye BITUING WALANG NINGNING. Without me knowing, tears flowed from my eyes. I dont know what i felt the very moment i read the message. Mixed emotions. Unexplainable. I hurriedly went to the CR so that they wont noticed me crying. Then i tried to take away in my mind the message. I took my dinner, but just the same, it echoed all over which caught me floating in the air looking far-a-distance.

AFter eating, I joined them in the sala now watching the finale episode of Sa Piling Mo, I was teary eyed again. I tried to hold on the tears, yes! the tears, which was not caused by the heartwarming scenes from the teleserye but from Jelson's message which keep on flashing into my mind.

Here, ill gonna say what i want to say, in an open letter for a "friend" whom i thought was true and sincere

Dear Jelson,

Im sorry if it was a terrible mistake for you to have known me, I never asked God for me to meet you along the way, were both victims of circumstances. Just consider me a part of your nightmare.

Its painful to know that the person whom you consider a "FRIEND" thinks that it was a terrible mistake to know me. If it is indeed a mistake, then my apology. I was just a fool to think that such angelic aura you wear, the warm accomodation when were together, and the smiles you thrown were all manifestations of a true friendship, I was terribly wrong.

My only mistake as far as i know maybe is to think that you are my friend and i have the right to at least take part in resolving a part of your problem. Kasalanan ko lang na makilala ka at maging parte ng buhay mo.

Thank you and goodluck.

Just the same, i wish you all the best.

a friend,
JayR

2006-08-10T23:48:00.000-08:00

Self-image and Self-awareness, MAY REBIEW [sic] - pun intended

The atenista strikes again, this time perhaps rooted from the forwarded SMS message he sent to me last night which goes something like this…

DESCRIBE ME IN ONE WORD… which I replied…”SUPERFICIAL.”

NOw lets review his short erroneous “realization” blog

Here is the original unadulterated entry (of course he will be editing it by the time he reads mine)

Self-Image and Self-awareness

Do u sometimes wonder why people that you know describe you differently? Often wonder why people misjudge you? Ever felt that you are different to the ones that you know? Confusing right? I came to a realization that we have different self image that we portray to different people. That in our sobconcious mind we portray different roles to different individuals. People say that they know you but actually they dont. We act in different roles as a person. As for me I act as a student, a brother, a friend, a lover and all those stuff. All of them has an expectation from you. In order to satisfy that expectation you subconcious mind tend to make a good impression towars them. To tell you honestly you should tell people what you want them to here in order not to create conflict. Yes, i believe in freedom of expression but in the real world you should be plastic in order for you to get what you want. Yes, I may be superficial and all that but who isnt? Going back I dont know if its a fact but I thibk that the maximum limit of a person knowing another person is about 75%. You know why? Because we are very dinamic and we are subjected to change, in the way we think, act and even in our physical aspects. .... I think thats all...

just a thing to think about.

Do you really know that person? Do u really know yourself?....

He is once again murdering the universal language with this blog! Huh! What a shame for an atenean like him. There’s no such thing as SOBCONCIOUS, and so does the word DINAMIC. And how about this sentence To tell you honestly you should tell people what you want them to here in order not to create conflict What does this suppose to mean? Ah you mean HEAR? And not HERE I guess.

What a great point you have to believe that in the real world you SHOULD be plastic in order to get what you want. Now I know, coming straight from the horse’s mouth, you have acknowledged that you’re indeed superficial. Too bad. Tsk tsk.

The irony of all these things is that he entitled his blog with something like self awareness, is he aware then that he wrote badly everytime he post an entry? Is he aware of what he is talking about being plastic and all?

Now that’s something to think about each time he bragged about his being an atenean, all of them has, IT SHOULD BE HAVE, where is subject verb agreement for the atenista that he is.?

Post script:
I am not claiming perfection for i believe i had errors too, but for someone who calls my school NEVER HEARD, he should be careful of his own blogging because his school is VERY WELL KNOWN!

2006-07-24T18:22:00.000-08:00

A Person for Others, a rebuttal

The Mr. & Ms. AB search last night at USEP turned out somewhat "tragic" which lead to a sangre blog Person for Others by an atenista by name, but by wisdom and knowledge is way below the ateneo standard.

Well, let us first examine the blog. It is a lame blog which an elementary pupil could possibly write better. Trying to bragged about his being atenean! Oh my god. Being proud of being atenean, the question is, Is Ateneo proud of having a trying to be great atenista on its rooster of students?

"It's like he's not educated or something, well he's just a social climmer" (obviously he edited it by the time you're reading this) Now an atenista who never knew the spelling of the word climber!!! Disappointing! It could never be a typographical error for in the past he would always misspelled very common words. Well i can understand why he could not correctly spell the word scrutinize, (its not screwtinize darling) because it is not a common word for people of his intellectual level, but the words recitation and steel? oh my god, what have your elementary english teacher has taught you on spelling. Dont be a fool out of your own bragging of being an atenista. Its not "resitation" and worst steel is far different from steal. English 101 please...

Person for others... Yup you have literally personified the phrase. You are a person for others in a sense that you are showing another persona when you expose yourself to the world but i know and you know the real you. Your real capacity and your real level of intellect.

Its better to be frank than to show compassion without a heart. To have a "super tupperware" attitude and to elevate oneself to high heavens is not something an atenista should possess....

Bragging oneself to the standard of Ateneo just because you are enrolled in such prestigious school is nothing, for at the end of the day when reality sets in, let me rephrase a line from Laviña of the classic Bituing walang ningning "Youre nothing but a second rate trying hard...atenista"

You can never be a person for others if you are wearing a mask all along.

2006-06-27T20:21:00.000-08:00

Wet and Wild; Borj Birthday Celebration

Wala uy, special ka kaysa sa iyaha...

That was Borj message, enough to convince me to come with him for a night of celebration. Purportedly referring to his partner, hahaha.

Yesterday, january 26, 2006, my autistic friend (hehe, sowee for that ) is turning a year older. AS early as 10am we have committed ourselves to have the celebration together later at night, but surprisingly, Harry came into the picture, and who are we to say no to this mortal. Hahaha. This guy who have been the subject of our SMS exchange and the subject of the desires of our hearts, oh-uh thats friendship we had before of course. So there you go, a seemingly new triumvirate to have the night to celebrate borj's natal day.

7pm at the San Pedro Cathedral was our meeting place. I arrived there at around 6:00 o’clock. Since i knew the birthday celebrant as usual is a "Filipino time" aficionado, i joined in the on going mass at the cathedral. Right after the mass, i check my mobile and Borj message shone in my inbox awaiting for me to read.

6:19 "Brow San pedro na ku" Huh! i have been there for quite sometimes, but i knew when he says he is there it only means, he is still on his way. True enough, he was on his way still. Couple of minutes passed, i sat at the entrance of the Cathedral waiting for him. He came, with his usual smile hmmmm, bringing along with him a belt bag, donning his cap and what that fan he was holding for? haha. Accordingly he came from a rally, hahay, the activist borj did not even spared his birthday from joining his colleague on their cause. Anyway, it took us a couple of minutes waiting for Harry to come. We just talk about anything from Chino whom he saw at JS, well some information i got which is very confidential enough to divulge here, i am keeping my mouth shut. hehe We talk about Arki whom he had an afternoon with to King and to everyone who popped up in our mind.

Then Harry came, with his aura blooming to high heavens, hmmmm... Wearing a green shirt, oh not a yellow shirt this time around, matched with jeans, bringing a back-pack bag , sporting a hairdo styled with gel and oh well the lovely scent that dominated the air when he approached us!!!! whoa!We check our phone.... Sensing that we were trying to tell him that he's late, he blurted out Di ako late ha, 7pm ang usapan natin, milagro dili late ning isa. Hahah.

After minutes of talking there, we decided to start our night, when the unfriendly weather start pouring in graces from heaven. Hahay. a remiscent of our friday night outing. We crossed the street and together conquered Mandarin for our dinner. The half-filled Mandarin bolton was quiet with litle audible murmurs we heard when we entered the resto. We took the table at the far end corner and had the waiter get our order.1 pork asado with fried rice for me, 1 pork asado with plain rice for borj and a humba with plain rice for Harry. Two green mangoe shake for me and Harry and an ice tea for Borj. Well thats enough for our tummy to be filled. The usual Harry Borj and Jayr eating together, talking and laughing in between and cracking some naughty jokes to lighten up our dinner mood. We constantly reminded Harry about his affection to someone we knew because he would surely be crying in the end, for we know Harry when he is in loved will literally put everything away just because of such damn love. Grrrr. Flashing that smile, we knew, we have not convinced him, but at least we gave our advise.

Huh, the rain just keep on coming even after we have finish eating. And just like before, we were like children playing under the rain, walking and crossing the street. A wet and wild street party indeed. Huh! whatta way to celebrate a birthday, well , this is borj afterall, weird in everything that he is, so why not get wet........

We headed to Boyztown for another shot of our celebration. Already soaked in our wet clothes, thanks for Borj's extra shirt, I kept myself dry enough to avoid any complications thereafter. Boyztown here we are.

Borj treated us for a fun-filled-naughty-cum-wet and wild celebration with our usual trip , the videoke.!!! One song after the other as the beer filled glass do a round robin on our lips, the disco light moving in a sexy splendid manner, the woobly dizzy trio again created a scene with the usual hugs and kisses. Hahaha. Pakiss beh. . hmmm slap slap slap... naughty naughty naughty

After the last bottle was down, we get out from the place and headed towards Jollibee Bolton for our post midnight snack. We positioned ourselves outside the building to take a glimpse of the early morning sky while consuming our cheeseburger and the French fries that was scattered in the tray.

After that, we kiss goodnight and ended our celebration. Me and Harry boarding the jeep towards home while Borj took his route way back.

Happy birthday brow!

We love you very much

2006-06-27T20:12:00.000-08:00

Harry Up!

The other night when our aborted meeting with my girlfriend, i was lying quietly in bed at 10pm when series of messages came into my inboxes, late messages sent as early as 6 oclock. Huh! what a lame service of Smart communication. One particular message caught my attention, a message coming from a Chikka account.

Belated happy bday jay, love u... miss u. ala jud ko nila gitagaan ug num nimo bah, lain au silaasa diay ka now? kita na lang tafree ko ugma, text lang ko nimo sa hapon.

So there you go. last night after i met borj at JS together with the other sangre who were heading for webster's bday celebration, i opted to change my routine and met Harry instead.
The rain poured heavily so we had a stop at jollibee bolton and sit for a one piece chicken and a jolly hotdog together with an mais-con-yelo ice craze. The service counter assistant was very accomodating enough to the point that we were cracking some jokes on her and she gamely played with it.

We stationed ourselves in one of corner at the upper section of the building where we can chat loud enough without irritating some other customer. Reminiscing the good old days we had, and remembering the who's who in our lives. We talk about some common friends, about Borj and Rain among others. Enjoying every seconds we had that time for its has been almost a year of not seeing each other.

After we were done with our meals, we went outside and the rain just keep on puring heavily. We continued our chat in one corner outside the jollibee premise while waiting for the rain to stopped, but it did not. We decided to take a shot with our nasal and voice chords so there we go, crossed the moderately traffic and flooded street to have an acces for a ride towards rizal.
Room # 5, that was our videoke session where we had an hour to sing our hearts out with handful of songs sorted out from the experiences that shaped our friendship and everything that transpired in our lives.

Here are the songs...

KAILAN PA MA'y IKAW by Christian Bautista
SIGNIFICANCE: the song embodies our friendship that even if we were not able to meet every now and then, still we are a friend to each other.Lil did I know that Harry is now changing taste. Haha. Before when he chose a song, its always been an Erik Santos song, now its Christian...hmmm. how time flies.... In fairness the attendant could not help but say her admiration on Harry's vocal prowess.

WHEREVER YOU WILL GO by The Calling
SIGNIFICANCE: We may have travelled our own personal routes in life, still we managed to look for a crossroad to be able to meet in the end, may it by dreams or in reality.
I personally chose the song because this has been my all time favorite song. Since the day i heard my friend Jepoy sang this way back in Bohol, it remained my most love personal favorite.

HOW DID YOU KNOW by Gary Valenciano
SIGNIFICANCE: Obviously we never knew why our path crossed, it was one fateful night when we met and sealed a friendship that till this very moment survived amidst distance and time.
He was asking me why i am choosing that song and for whom it was intended for. haha . Well i know that Borj knew it for that song never escaped from our repertoire (haha) when we had our videoke session together.

SAY THAT YOU LOVE ME by Martin Nievera
SIGNIFICANCE: We need not to utter this line for we know deep inside us that we care .
Hahaha. He complained that he cant sing the song because it reminded him of someone in his past. Well who would not be affected by this heartwarming song as this song also was a part of my lovely past. haaaay! teary eyed jayR ...

THE WAY YOU LOOK AT ME by Christian Bautista
SIGNIFICANCE: Oh-uh while singing this song, what the heck is that stare Harry.. hahaha
I chose the song for this is my song for my girlfriend reign... I love you honey.

SOMETIMES WHEN WE TOUCH By Dan Hill
SIGNIFICANCE: This song reminded us of someone ...
When the tv screen flashed the song title, we burst into laughter. hahaha. Harry Harry Night... lolz. I remember an event. As Harry puts it. "Autistic jud!" haha indeed!

SAME GROUND by Kitchie Nadal
SIGNIFICANCE: I dont understand why im feeling so bad now when i know its my idea... hahay
He never finish the song... why oh why...

BROKEN VOW by Martin Nievera
SIGNIFICANCE: Undeniably we had some broken vows in the past.
He stopped singing when he saw me crying. Oh that was exaggeration. I was only teary eyed. Hahahaha

YOU'LL BE SAFE HERE By Rivermaya
SIGNIFICANCE: To ligthen up the mood, we need a song to uplift both of us...
I just love the lyrics and melody of this song

I BELIEVE I CAN FLY by Erik Santos
SIGNIFICANCE: Any Erik Santos song would remind us of my birthday last year....
Well, just reminisce the good old days....

THE WARRIOR IS A CHILD by Gary Valenciano
SIGNIFICANCE: nothing really. rico yan fanatics we are...hahaha... just kidding
Senti mode we were again...

COLOURS EVERYWHERE By Christian Bautista
SIGNIFICANCE: We both love this song
We just had a uninimous choice for this one

MAKITA KANG MULI by Sugarfree
SIGNIFICANCE: Obviously its for the two of us...after long absence
Accordingly it was his first time to sing such song, but he did it fairly with justice... great job harry

THE PAST By Jed Madela
SIGNIFICANCE: well we all had our past so who would not be touched by this song
Harry harry harry ikaw na naman ngayon ang umiyak...hehehehe... bad jayr slap slap slap

ID RATHER By Luther Vandross
SIGNIFICANCE: Hayy just someone singing me this song before... only to end me up crying.
The attendant told us our time is up so that was our finale song that night.

After excercising our diaphrams,it was already 9:45, we gave the night another shot at lovely life it is. We celebrated our friendship anew and sealed yet another night of endless encounter as it will be added to the already fun-filled chapter in our budding friendship. We closed the night after we have finally rested after a long night encounter of souls longing for each other.

Thanks for the night brow... I enjoyed it..

Home sweet home (1:25am)

2006-06-22T19:19:00.000-08:00

Thank you

Thank you is what i could utter for making my natal day filled with greetings and well wishes from the poeple who loved me and whom i loved too.

Here they are in correct and exact order:

from text messages

From Dondie:
Hapi bday kuya jayr, muwah! how old r u now? (12:09)
MY REACTION : Whew! bunso youre the first to greet!
MY RESPONSE : Despite knowing me in just a short span of time, im glad you remembered my birthday and we became this close. Bunso thank you very much!

From Borj
Happy Birthday, Whew! Hapy Birthday, Hapy Birthday (12:23am)
MY REACTION: Eto na naman ang autistic
MY RESPONSE: One year is enough for us to get to know each others life's dance, i knew deep within that whatever happens, wherever life leads us, the memories we shared together will be kept in the stillness of our hearts. Love you brow.

From Josh Raven
Happy birthday... San tau? (12:24am)
MY REACTION: Whew! whatta way to start my birthday
MY RESPONSE: Thank you bro... hmmm, san tau? pwede sa queensland? hahaha.... nu regalo mo sakin? (I meet this guy through our clan and what makes him cut above the rest is his wits which i adored.)
HIS RESPONSE: FLESH....

From King
happy birday mr. President our majesty! jejeje,,, enjoy the life has given to u! jejeje. sabta na lang (12:24 am)
MY REACTION: Ano daw?
MY RESPONSE: Thank you tart, yes i am trying to enjoy my life.

From Chino Martin
Hapi hapi bday! Teker and Godbless") (1:19am)
MY REACTION: SHOCKS!!! unexpected message *jawdropped, mouth open*
MY RESPONSE: Thank you dude, i never expect really a greeting from you. I knew despite our distance, despite the lack of communication, the memories we shared before will long live in one of chapter of my life

From Cuzn Rhodz
HAPI BERTDEY cuz! may God gve u more bdays 2 cum nd continue shower His blessings and graces. njoy ur day! mwahhh (6:28am)
MY REACTION: As oweiz hindi nawawala ang God nito
MY RESPONSE: Thanks cuz, thank you very much

From Inday Almie
Happy happy happy birthday nd more blessings 2 come , unsa imo handa? (6:44)
MY REACTION: Kahit ano handa ko, darating ka kaya?
MY RESPONSE: thank you siz for remembering my birthday. god bless

From Cuzn Dian
Happy bday my dear cuz! Hav a great day 2day! mwah! Mwah! (7:57)
MY REACTION: I love you cuz...
MY RESPONSE: You knew you will oweiz be a special cuz to me. Ingatz oweiz

From Ronald
Dude, gud am. kht nakalimutan mo i grit ako i still want 2 grit u a hapi b day. Have a nice day ahead of you . God Bless always (8:10)
MY REACTION: I did not forget, i just did not mind sending a greeting (slap slap slap jayR)
MY RESPONSE: dude, thank you.

From Cuzn Debi
Happy happy happy birthday to my favorite cousin deari. (hugs mwah) enjoy ur day and may your wishes come true. I miss you (8:26)
MY REACTION: mY fave cuz, i mizz u too
MY RESPONSE: Thank you pretty cuz, you will oweiz be my special cuzn.

From Ate tita
***forwarded message*** (8:47)
MY REACTION: Oh no i dont really appreciate forwarded message
MY RESPONSE: I know your busy enough, thank you for taking time sending me a message

From Christian
Ei, apee weeday Mr. Prexy, certified tigulang na jud ka ... hehehehehehe (9:42)
MY REACTION: With age, comes the wisdom *wink*
MY RESPONSE: Thank you arki, mwah mwah, see you around

From Raye
Happy birthday! (9:45)
MY REACTION: Such a simple message that gets into my senses!
MY RESPONSE: Thank you girl, thank you for the memories

From Bart
Hapy birthday pres., Tke cre always (10:32)
MY REACTION: huh! is this another way to win my trust back?
MY RESPONSE: thanks anyway

From LR
Happy birthday bro, 2matanda ka na kaya wag na pasaway ha! hehe! may God bless u always Rembr dat LR is here 4u nomater wat happen. I love u dude (10:49)
MY REACTION: giggle... im so touch
MY RESPONSE: Thank you very much bro, thank you for taking time to meet me despite your busy and limited schedule in coming to davao. I love you too. Pwomise mag.behave na ku

From Lester
Hapi birthday mr. President (11:31)
MY REACTION: hmmmp bakit ka ganyan
MY RESPONSE: tenchu very much dude

From Rain
Happy bday jahyar. I wish u good health. Cenxa ala ko load kaya naktxt lang ako. Rain (4:07)
MY REACTION: whew! tnx for the effort.
MY RESPONSE: Thank you bro, kahit we exchange some nasty words the night before, we seem to be ok with each other still... peace!

From Reign
***forwarded message**
MY REACTION: Hahay, d ba marunong gumawa ng sariling message!
MY RESPONSE: Thank you honey, i love you very much. thank you for the understanding and love. mwah

Thanks also to the following;
Hazel for the testimonial
Cuzn shoi and auntie dadz
rose, rony, krizia , especially maam christy for the sumptuous lunch and heavy snack
to ranz , paul and of course my favorite jelson...

i love you all

~jayR

2006-06-08T23:58:00.000-08:00

MEET THE SANGRE
The story behind the BIG NIGHT as told by jayR

One night. One group. One celebration. Its the Big Night!!!

June 3 2006
Mervillas Resort,
9 pm

twas saturday boredome again at work when my superior told us that we gonna close office early. Eager to prepare myself to the BIG NIGHT i went home and packed up my things. I texted Rain couple of messages because as planned we shall meet at the mall by 7pm but Smurf's message told me to go the venue as early as 7 to finalize things up.

I went to the mall. Bought things needed in the event. Lynx and Suzaku were texting for my whereabouts. And there you go, Rain showed his presence at jollibee premise where i took off some sort of a dinner since the event is most likely to start by past 9 oclock. And as usual Rain displayed his attitude problem and stage a walk-out. Knowing myself, the pride of jayr hinders me to pursue him and just let him go and walk on my way to the grocery section. While looking for some of the things needed, Lynx told me we gonna meet at Acacia so there i go prepared myself for the exit from the mall when i received a message from Rain. Hahah. there you go.

We went to Acacia only to receive a message from Suzaku that they were at NCCC express, we proceeded there again with no Lynx and suzaku in sight. Accordingly they have moved to Roxas where they meet the others. So we moved in.

Finally we met. Shaking hands with unfamiliar faces that made up the sangreal clan. there was lynx, suzaku, cisko , ken and of course our "bunso" dondie. Among them it was Dondie's smile that captured my attention. Whew with his young age he has sported a 5'9" with a moreno complexion matched with the warm big smile worn on his face. Whatta guy indeed! He just told me something about Chino. haha the hell i care if he is avoiding me ...

On the way to the main event.

Finally when Ichigo came, the pioneering 12 was complete. And as the BIG NIGHT kicked off, the Getting To Know You activity was done. The mechanics of the game was one bottle, a sangre shall introduce himself to the group then an interaction follows afterwhich he will drink from the bottle , get one name pass the bottle and sealed it with a kiss. There you go.

Meet our bunso. Dondie tagged as the kilabot na moreno ng ateneo, indeed personified his tagline. Such a big young guy equipped with the super energy that overflows in his system mesmerize all the sangre in the youngness of the night at that particular moment when he gamely started the GTKY activity. Showing is asset, the best ever close-up smile!!!! who not loved our bunso... He sealed his moment via a kiss to Lynx. the next man on board.

Lynx, one of the founders, our resident artist is quite a shy guy, still on his way to showing up the real him to the clan. Though such shyness doesnt hinders him from pursuing a connection to all the sangre. Passed his moment to Ichigo.

Meet our very own pambato na sangre ng mga atenista. A computer science degree holder from ateneo, Ichigo has such combination of sweet aura and innocence incorporated in a loving eyes that speaks a lot. A soft spoken guy who has indeed made it to the clan of royal blooded mortals. Ichigo shared the night to Ken.

Ken, the newest sangre to replace Blaze who exited from the clan is a reserved type of guy who at that time was on his casual look with lots of reservation from such young guy. He then kissed his way to Rain.

Rain, small cutie guy literally and figuratively. Despite such physical presence, his innermost charm has captured all the way to each and every sangre around. And it was me whom he shared his kiss with.

After my turn, haha, smurf it was...

Smurf, technically the owner of the clan for this is his brainchild is as always been captivating and a magnet to everyone around. HIs wits and talents alone could be his weapon to to gain what its due for him. Smurf closed his moments with a kiss to Cisko.

Oh-uh cisko the guy whose innocence and shyness has made him the sangre to be the less talkative one. But despite such personality he wore, i have come to know the real Cisko when we had a quality time talking to each other. Cisko gave his kiss to Eros

Yes this is the guy to watched out for, given the intellect that is above ordinary, the smile that captures everyone and what the heck is that magnetic stare that could literally put you butt naked! huh! I had a chance to share the night with him and i discovered a complex personality in him that made him more lovable the first time i saw him. He was quite but when he started to do the talking, he talked a lot and with a sense mind you. This is one hell of a guy equipped with a principle so strong that sets him apart from every sangre there were. He dont need to talk a lot to get notice, his aura is a living example of magnetism. He gave back the kiss to Dondie where the latter had blow it to Ichiro

Ichiro, one of the quiet guys too. yes he was there. His presence is felt yet we failed to know the real him coz he was so quiet, but generally, our reception on him was that he is a nice guy to reckon with.

Suzaku, the last but not the least ended the game with his turn to speak up. This guy is our baby sangre, baby faced suzaku has captivated some of the sangre's interest and thus made him one of the most bankable sangre aside from eros.

Of course there were some dull moments, there were some sweet nothing moments, but overall we made it as a memorable night to date.

We witness the sunrise as it gave a nice view to the Mount Pinatubo. What a BIG NIGHT indeed

2006-05-21T03:11:00.000-08:00

Cracking Da Vinci Movie

Famed symbologist Professor Robert Langdon is called to the Louvre museum one night where a curator has been murdered, leaving behind a mysterious trail of symbols and clues. With his own survival at stake, Langdon, aided by the police cryptologist Sophie Neveu, unveils a series of stunning secrets hidden in the works of Leonardo Da Vinci, all leading to a covert society dedicated to guarding an ancient secret that has remained hidden for 2000 years. The pair set off on a thrilling quest through Paris, London and Scotland, collecting clues as they desperately attempt to crack the code and reveal secrets that will shake the very foundations of mankind.

As early as sunday I bought two tickets because Neil said "nagkaubusan na". So there I go, i texted my girl if she is interested to watch the movie, but after two or three messages, i got no response. So the following monday, i ask my good friend Dean Mark if he could join me to the cinema by thursday, unfortunately his schedule for his work is closing time so it would be impossible to catch the 7:30 premiere. I was thinking of whom i could spend the movie date with, a person who has the wits to be able to open up his/her wits on the controversial movie. As i browse my phonebook, there i go, Borj my brow. I texted him and the rest as they say is history.

As usual Borj came late on the agreed time. When he came and flashed that too good for comfort smile I was helpless and throw away back a smile. Huh!!!

The special screening
After eating dinner we proceeded to cinema one and went to the designated seats in the upper left side corner. And there I go, as expected Neil Roy was there together with his date...hmmmmm. hahaha. After a few minutes of waiting, two voices dominated the air, though we cant see them because of dimness of the stage, I still figured out that the host were all gay introducing themselves as Mona and Lisa (nice one there, hehe). Then they iniatiated a "bring me game". Bring me jacket , da vinci code book and the most fun part was bring me a condom. Yeah the hosts were lively with funny adlibs when they interview the participants. then the movie started.

The Actors
Tom Hanks leads the cast as the famed symbolist Robert Langdon. He was perfect for the role though his acting was not as bright as his performances in other movies he starred in.

Audrey Taotou as french cryptologist Sophie Neveu was not shining all throughout the movie. She was dull and looks uninteresting in the bigscreen

Ian Mckellen's performance as Sir Leigh Teabing was undoubtedly the best performances among the actor in the film. He successfully gave life the the wits and candidness of the Leigh Teabing of the book as described by Dan Brown

Paul Bettany as Silas. He did a good job, justifying every pain that the character of Silas supposedly felt during his self infliction of pain to experience the suffering of Christ.

The Adaptation
The movie version tried to do a faithful adaptation from the movie but cinematic purposes hinders some scenes to be changed and or edited like how Robert Langdon was brought to the museum by the French police. In the book he was at the hotel sleeping when the agent wake him up while in the movie he was there signing autographs for the book he wrote.There maybe some loopholes in the story from the book version Ron Howard made a stunningly great visualization plus the added music that captivated each actions and scenes, though sometimes it seems that they put on too much music on it that made it a loud and noisy film not to mention the too many narrations and dialogues which is essential to be able to really get into the point of the story.The movie started beautifully with the murder of Jacques Saunierre and it ended up heartwarmingly with Robert Langdon finally getting to where the Holy Grail is situated. Such a big impact to the crowd when Tom Hanks on bended knees felt the end of his quest matched with the music background suited for the dramatic ending. An applause was all the audience give to credit the flick that I may add to my list of my all time favorites.

Judging from the book version and the movie version, the book still stands out maybe because of the thrill and excitement that every clues , anagrams and riddles on it which can be read literally, while in the movie, though it tried to incorporate the ancient world to be able to fully narrate the story, it failed to keep the audience glued on the the riddles and anagrams precisely
because clues and riddles were only spoken and if captured by camera, its only on a flash.

****We let others go first before we had our exit at the movie house. We were still talking about the movie and everything of its element, from the acting to the more controversial point of Jesus having a bloodline.Borj and I stayed in front of Gmall which is now in total contrast of its stature during daytime. The dimly lit building was the witness of two souls exchanging wits and emotions for almost an hour there. We really had a great time spending the rest of the night together.
Thank you brow. thanks for the night. thanks for the company. see you when i see you again... i love you brow...

and as stated

I am the living witness to the divine proportionWitness the biggest cover up of human history.... and you know what is it brow... *wink*

~jayR

2006-04-30T23:18:00.000-08:00

April Acts; Acts and Aspirations combined

The fourth chapter of the year has just ended. A total of 6 blogs has been published online sorted out from the many experiences that has ostensibly happened in my life like a gigantic edifice standing gloriously way up to the sky.

Chill was the first blog to be published this month. A collection of experiences that shaped the first half of the month. Absurdities in life which were manifested in a gathering of mortals trying to escape from the reality of uncertainties and imperfections. Along the way, i was saddened about the death of my uncle Jose to whom i once attended a his wake which lead me to the blog which i entitled In Memory. A blog that manifest my disgust over how people tend to memorize routines and not wholeheartedly doing it.

One saturday night, while waiting for my other comrades for our saturday night fun, i sit down in front of the pc and posted a survey Survey Says which my friends Borj, Chino, Harry and Josh responded. It turned out funny yet come to think of it, its for real. hahaha. Afterwhich, the night of fun began when the tres marias conquered 183 anew. I had fun together with Ranz and Norby at Rizal Promenade in such wonderful nights of foods, drinks, dance and something in between. Its Saturday Night Once Again

Holy week came when boredome came anew. And before it could eat me up to death, i accompanied sugar and we watch the hilarious movie flick 'D Lucky Ones. A bonus treat i got when we meet borj in the mall after watching the movie. He introduced me to King who completed what seems to be The Newest Triumvirate

Closing my blog entry for the month is a collection of people whom i met through MIRC with Borj leading the list. Best Finds @ MIRC

There you go, another chapter has ended. Another one is about to start. I am just hoping for the best to come

FOR THIS MONTH:
reading: interesting article on readers digest april edition is the article about a mother who risk her own life just to brought the child who never was if and when she decided to choose the other option around.
MOVIE: D lucky ones delighted my black saturday boredome and has brought somehow smiles in me especially when i saw my niece enjoying the movie. That was our last bonding before she went home for bohol vacation.
MUSIC: Toni Gonzaga's We Belong is strikingly a must heard song for me this month. The melody and oh uh the lyrics struck me the most.
TV: well who would not be glued to pbb teen edition dozen of new faces that renewed my interest in the show again! Early favorites includes the tandem of Mikee and Kim and theres the teenage mom Jamilla and hunky fred. Cutie boy aldred topped my list, though as of this writing, he is out from the house via a voluntary exit.

~JAYr

2006-03-31T17:09:00.000-08:00

March Moves; Mundane Mysteries of life

Whew, another month has been wrapped up. Without me knowing, I have already posted 8 blogs for this month, a record it is. Maybe, this months gives me a roller-coster ride with life with feelings ranging from excitement, to happiness, to loneliness, to heartbreaking to surprising.

I started to write a blog for the third installment of the year via my thoughts and feelings on the much hyped Rustom Confession (The Rustom Confession) inside Kuya's house. it leads to self actualization to make sure of what am I in my own perspective of views. Many may labeled may as gay because of the way I move, this feminine like moves and action I have is attributed to the fact that I grew up in an almost all girl family. I lost my father at such early age and I grew up with my mother, my sister , my grandma and my tita's and beautiful cousins around.

This month, I have watched the highly sensationalized and critically acclaimed flick Brokeback Mountain (In Tears ) , a one of its kind film that showed unprecendented love of two cowboys who both shared the same feelings for each other. The film by the way won as best film for the Golden Globe Awards while it was crushed by the movie CRASH over the Oscar's best picture plum.

With the movie's unparalleled love theme, i have came to my own lovestory this month via a going down to memory lane with reign ( Nostalgic Conversation ) , it was indeed a refreshing way of making the flame alive inside me. I love you reign. You are my life.

In the field of love, its a paradox indeed. I remember an SMS message from raver with thoughts like this... Life is a paradox. What you want isnt really what you get. What you get isnt really permanent. What is permanent is really boring.... True enough, life much with love's complixities causes anxiety to everyone around. Just like what happen to my three friends who have encounter dilemma in the cupids world. (Dr Love, Am I? ) Speaking of dilemma, me and borj again was cought in a web of entanglement when Chino purportedly on a fabricated situation of lies and hypocrisy (Random Thoughts ). Nevertheless, we extended our hands to show that friendship we have is for real.( The Child In Us )

And as the paradox of life continues, people like borj really deserved to be applauded. He succesfully made and i proclaim him an artist extraordinaire The Logo

I capped the month with real people with a night of steamy encounter, foods, and sensible conversation and a great laughters. Whatta Night . Its really a good feeling to be with people whom you feel security and great camaraderie with no pretensions and deception.

March. Moving towards the ambiguities of life. Mundane things come in surprising manner, I just took it the way it is. And so far, the month ended with a big bang. Whatta month!!!!

FOR THIS Month
Books: Angels and Demons by Dan Brown, i completed reading this prequel of The Da Vinci Code and its worth the bucks i spent to grab a copy for this one. Amazing and spectacular indeed.
Music: Kris Lawrence's When I see you smile is a great listening pleasure to me this month, in between Kamikaze's Narda song.
TV: its PBB celebrity edition still that cought me glued on the idiot box, while the funny antics of Princess Lulu delighted anew my TV viewing habit
Movie: Well its still Brokeback Mountain to top the list. and FEARLESS wasnt really a nice movie worthy of my time. hahaha

~jayR

2006-03-02T00:01:00.000-08:00

February Facades; Facets of Life Unveiled

February it is. A month full of heartwarming kisses and love { Much Ado About Valentines } But this isnt what the exodus of the year seemed to be for me and for whats happening around.

I started my february blogging with my sympathy on the stampede at the ultra { Stampede! } which cost lives of filipinos who put their destiny on game of luck.

My sangfroid state-like love month was devoted on reading the controversial Dan Brown's novel The Da Vinci Code { Da Vinci Code } to the point that i get hooked to such controversial point and found myself in the National Bookstore premise reading the counter-attack novel which is "Cracking Da Vinci Code".

The desultory circle of acquaintances widened with Rain whom we have first of firsts, whatever that means. Melvin showed his therapeutic skills into a soothing tired and exhausted body of mortals around. Huh! A new acquaintance with that guy named nathan which i never did have an idea why he is interested in knowing me. haha. the hell i care though.

Middle of the month, an unexpected twist paved the way into the calmness of my life as Chino from nowehere and with no reasons, has invaded my inbox anew { Two Messages Received } . Prior to our meeting again, I met Borj at McDo one fine lazy afternoon. I missed the days where our polemic shots on certain issues increased gradually the bonding which we nurtured through our nights of togetherness. Such indolent afternoon of eating sundae , chicken McDo and Mcspaghetti was eclipsed by a comrade looking scalawag in his worn-out clothing inside the foodchain. But borj's erudite appeal managed to steal the stares of the people around away from the third party. The meeting was short but was fruitful enough for I have pass on the request i ask for him. haha.

My long time internet buddy jess made his fair share of the month of unexpected twist which entices into a night of unforgettable drama unfolding. whew!

But things get into a helluva twisted ride when Chino and I meet again. At the mall we met though as always he was still in tarry consuming decades before he arrived, we capped such a night to take the desultory friendship rose to life once again. NOt the stares and smile could wash away my skeptical criticisms on him about his newly fashioned or should i say fashioned-victimized look { He Came Back! }

What a complicated february it is

And to make a more complications out of complicated things, heres one big secret for you to unveiled. inspired by the encryptions from DA Vinci Code, i too made my own cryptology 101. haha

"i am the living tribute to the divine proportion"

1168
AXE BUS I MAIL
SO OVEN JAIL
THINK MONEY LONG HEAVEN

decode it if you can, haha

************************
FOR THIS MONTH:
REaders Digest; Texting Mr Right, i think this is one hell of a love story. Very nice
Music; Heaven Knows (this angel has flown away from me) by Orange and lemons, i dont know why everytime i hear the song, it made me shiver ...lolz...
television; i get hook anew to the teleserye ng totoong buhay, pinoy big brother celebrity edition, from the inspiring rudy, to beautiful bianca to funny budoy and true person keanna, every housemates just gave me a great time off from work.
AND OF COURSE, the logo which i commissioned borj to do, im excited to see the outcome of what i have conceptualized., ill post it here once its finish.

~jayR

2006-02-05T04:00:00.000-08:00

STAMPEDE!

While I was busy doing my paper works at the office, my officemate coming from somewhere told us that something hurrible happened in Manila. Yes! a big event worthy being featured in the front page of CNN and BBC internet portals.

Wowowee Anniversarry turned tragic. killing a near hundreds of people and have injured many. This tragic incident happened early morning when people were pushing each other just to be able to get into the stadium to which the anniversary will be held later at noon.

The unfortunate incident costs lives of those people who were lining up as early as wednesday in the hopes of winning in any of the show's offered prizes. The sad footages of the tragedy being broadcast on almost all the television station have touched my hearts and I symphatize for those who lost their loveones. One particular touching scene was that of a child trying to awake his dead mother. SUch innocence has created an unusual feeling of pity and sadness within. huh

AS ABSCBN promised, they will shoulder all the burial expenses and the medical expenses of those who are injured. And for me, all i can do is to pray for those who died and for a speedy recovery of those who injured.
God bless everyone!

2006-02-05T03:58:00.000-08:00

JANUARY JAM: Back to Square One

The jump off month for 2006 has not been a good one for me, neither it wasnt that bad too.

I started the month trying to overcome with the lost of someone who became part of my system and everyday life. It's life's vagary indeed that keep things in unprecedented change. Never in my wildest dreams that I could succumbed myself into the lowest level of emotional torture.

I traversed life with the determination to move on. I work like there is no tomorrow till my humane body gave up and I got sick Its Official: I am Sick . Thanks to the people around who were concerned enough to get me back on track.

There comes Cyril who filled up the seemingly languor state in my passion for life. He brought back the smile in a night full of laughters and delight The Smile is Back .

I thought that was enough. I thought I'd been impervious of the tragic story that started the year, yet no matter how the rain carressed me with soothing coldness, i just cant help but look for the warmth of the sun. I have been zealously looking for camaraderie for human thirst of togetherness and sense of belonging. Few strange acquaintances never helped though. A movie with Marc, haha Enteng Kabesote it was (in fairness it made me laugh). I had some fun with my new buddies NIkko and Jay but there was this longing for a mother which I felt when her death anniversary came My Woman; The Superwoman of the World

Middle of the month was a turning point. This maybe the focal of the story for this month of my life. I got a copy of the January issue of Readers digest. I was inspired by its story apty titled " Soon He'll wake Up" and the article "inseparable" where the disease schizophrenia was being tackled. Hmmm that term used by borj on me. hahaha. Only then i realized that this friend of mine is the only means to quenched the thirst for security love and affection. Though we regularly communicate through SMS, it still differs when you hold the inimitable person in flesh and felt the prowess of human torch that brought me back to life.

And what else would be best to capped the month than to have it with borj. That was a night with less talk yet emotions were raging over to keep silence a shy to rule over.

He is now preparing for another exit yet im glad he'd been always the friend who always had the come back to ease the longing within us. So long my friend, may you safely conquer this new voyage in your lifelong travel and come back to the trail to fetch me back.

January Jam!!! jamming the start of the year by going back to square one. Stupid as i am, I wont cry because these things are over, but, I am happy and glad it happened.

FOR THIS MONTH i got hooked to:~reading my REaders Digest january issue~watching that koreanovela ONLY YOU (hahaha, i just cant help but identify myself with the character of JOnathan and crave for the loveaffair of TJ and Jillian, hahaha)~enjoying myself with the preparation for our grand reunion ~had fun watching Morales-Pacquiao rematch~going back to square one. basics in life

2006-01-19T02:27:00.000-08:00

I am SICK!

Its been decade since my seemingly machine-like body gave up. It just keep on working and working. Oh-uh you may say im telling hyperbolic stuffs here, but hey, as far as my memory serves me right, its been longtime ago since I got sick, thanks to my strong immune system that shields me from the diseases around.

Last Monday, after lunch, i did have a terrible feeling. I cannot explain what i felt. My whole body was numb and heat was dominating the entirety of my body. Still works has to be done. While religiously waiting for the clock to strike 5:15, i managed to keep my composure and do my responsibilities.

At long last, i came off from office and went straight home where the bed was awaiting to caress my sick body. Oh yes. Its official. I am sick! After letting my body worked to its limit to forget the emotional torture i am in, it finally gave up. Yes! i am sick!Right there and then, I was laid to bed not minding the tv newscast which is my pastime during my normal stature. After an hour, i was awaken by my aunt for dinner. After a hot-soup dinner, i took a tablet of paracetamol to somehow ease the pain that seems to crack my skull. Then back to bed snubbing my mobile phone that kept on accommodating messages into its inbox.

Into the night i was shivering in cold but then i managed to get some sleep till the kingly sun heralded the new day. Morning comes, yet, i was not yet in the mood to get up and be ready for work. My body just can’t make it, so i decided to be absent from work.

The entire day I was bid-ridden, thanks to baby Cyril for his continuous reminders to take my medicine, lunch, drink plenty of water, and eats some more fruits, I managed to get rid of the boredom at home. He just dont stop texting even if he's in school.

Yesterday, I get back to work despite my body not yet fully recovering. Last night before I went to sleep I called up borj and talk for a couple of minutes. I miss this bro of mine. He’s been busy preparing for his cebu invasion comes February. Afterwhich, I was like a child who has slept after hearing his mother’s sweet lullabyes.
AT 2 am, borj called me up again just for nothing. We talk a couple of minutes more and off I went back to sleep…

Here i am at the office writing my mind. AFter this i shall be meeting baby Cyril . Hmmm looks like im going back to the old me, flambouyant, happy go lucky guy ... well, thats life.

Its night time again!@!@#

2005-12-02T20:19:00.000-08:00

Betrayed!

I dont have the right to feel this way, I feel betrayed. Yes i knew I dont have any weapon to be able to fight for this, but i cant just help but feel betrayed.

Life oh life. Its been a tiresome journey in this rocky path towards happiness. Then i found the persons that have helped me become the real me. Who made me feel i am important, whom i have trusted everything, whom I have lay my cards on.

Its pretty painful to learn that without me knowing, fate have played again on me. This is not the first time nor the second time. Third time is painful, i thought i have been numb on this, but i am wrong. Very very wrong.

Last night after i met my friend which ended him lecturing about my attitude problem, i went home. My niece informed just I entered the gate that a friend of mine has been calling me twice a while ago. I was ecstatic to learn that he's been trying to contact me despite his being prohibited from using their landline because of a punishment accorded to him.

After Pinoy Big Brother, the phone rang. And it was him. With our short talk, i have confirmed my insinuations to be true. It hurts. NO i shouldnt be feelin like that, but it is really the real thing. Huh! Is that for real!? Things just keep on sinking into my senses the reality that is being slapped into my very own face. Yeah right. Reality hurts, it must be accepted right there and then. Yes! i knew it, I have to live in reality but never did I imagine that I could still be hurt with reality. Maybe because of all the people, I was expecting them to be the truest one, but they failed me.

Nothings changed i told him. But he kept on insisting that there is something wrong coz of my cold treatment on our conversation. Only now did I realized that I was indeed giving him cold shoulder. Haaay.

After the convee, everythings gathered from my memory bank, that i have concluded that after all, they have been giving me a reverse psychology. Haha, how fool am I to be in a situation where only idiots cant understand.
Reality bites in a twisted sunshine of unending web of complicated situations that our friendship hopefully may survived.

Nothings changed.
I hope.
Though there was hurting, I believe everythings will turn out fine.

Im kinda sleepy here now. Id been awake the entire night. Sleep wasnt there to take care of my tired and exhausted body.

Im tired. Give me a rest oh fate!

2005-11-28T20:54:00.000-08:00

Over the Weekend

Sometimes, great things come unexpected. And if it comes, it surely is a big surprise with no words from Mr. Webster could justify the joy it brought to you. Simple it may seem but if it means a lot, its really a joy forever.
Over the long weekend i had a great time bonding with my friend Chino. We had our seemingly usual routine of going out for a saturday night fun. We chose to go online that time and indeed we had a great time laughing our hearts out with someone whom we have chatted. Well then small things just brought laughters really from time to time.

After our online session, we stayed for a while at the lobby of the cafe and off we went our usual strolling round the city. Pass by the lafia net. Stayed for a couple of minutes and off we continued our stroll. Went to Freedom Park and talk there for quite an hour. And we strolled a lil bit more til we found ourselves in San pedro area. twas 5 am when we decided to call it a night.

Next day we agreed to hear mass together. We meet however at the mall together with my long lost friend Romeo. hahaha. After consuming a lasagna and a pizza we went home. Yes we planned to sleep at home. There at home, the night started with fun conversation when something happened that ruined our nights. Teary eyed Chino whose been on his first stumble confided with me while i was also in a nerve wrecking argument with "feel-nya-like-ko-syang-awayin-at-patulan-conceited-brainless" mortal from my past. Hahay. We manage to get through with those turbulent feelings by a way of going back to our childhood memories.

At 2am our tired body professes its inclination to be laid and continued the fantasy that were brought by human worldly cares. whoa! what a way to capped the night together. With a sound sleep i woke up at around 8:00 the following day, planning for the day ahead, and talking in between takes with him. We ate our breakfast and then go back to bed. haha. NO work, no class, so we pampered ourselves with rest rest and rest. We ate chocolates to attest the theories that it indeed may heal a broken hearts. hahaha.... though twas not really the intentions, it just came up my mind when i remembered us eating chocolates.

Pass 12:00 noon we went to the mall and had our lunch together. Bought shirts for us a-piece.
Until we realized its getting darker. WE bid ourselves goodbye.

Whoa, what a long weekend indeed!!
Thanks for the company brow...
Thank you for the fantasies brought to life...
Thank you for the smiles printed on our lips
Thanks for everything that transpired in the friendship that we manage to established...

You take care. until then
luvshue....
~jayR

2005-11-21T23:08:00.000-08:00

I love Magic

SYNOPSIS: Harry (Daniel Radcliffe) must contend with being mysteriously selected to compete in the prestigious Triwizard Tournament, a thrilling international competition that pits him against older and more experienced students from Hogwarts and two rival European wizarding schools.

Meanwhile, supporters of Harry's nemesis, the evil Lord Voldemort (Ralph Fiennes), send a shockwave of fear throughout the wizard community when their Dark Mark scorches the sky at the Quidditch World Cup, signaling Voldemort's return to power. But for Harry, this is not the only harrowing news causing him anxiety…he still has yet to find a date for Hogwarts' Yule Ball dance.

AFter i got out from the office, I hurriedly went to SM for a movie date with ma friend. We were happy to know that 4 out of 6 SM cinemas showed the movie Harry Potter. But when we went upstair, whoa!! what a line we saw. Nonetheless, we followed the line and off went to get our tickets. Went inside and see bunch of Harry Potter fanatics. Thanks God we managed to have our own seats. Some were in the alleys sitting and comforting themselves just to be able to see first and not be left behind when this talk of the town began to spread like a wildfire int he wilderness.

Cute no more. Goblet of Fire enchants with a darker aura of suspense and a welcomed menace. Harry Potter series indeed outdo every installment anew. And if you're indeed a Harry follower, you'll love this as the cinema version of book 4 is more appealing than when you read it on the thick book. The visuals are great and the performances were superb.

And as Harry puts it....

I LOVE MAGIC!

2005-11-21T23:06:00.000-08:00

YES I LOVED YOU, but I Chose To keep It Within
Yes losing love is injuring
The past continue its haunting
The heart still in great longing
Life's vision turned into a shattered dreams . . .
Ah, people really believed Im in love
I may deny it that I still have
They saw my eyes are glowing
My actions and words showed my true feelings
Neither did I expect that you'll give an impact in my life
Till i hold you in flesh against strifes
You made my days became more encouraging
You gave me another great reasons for living
Time Only brought us closer
Leaving anything and everything unravelled
Creating yet countless reasons to love the feeling
Living life in its new twist, a new dimension so engaging
Yet, I too, began to be afraid
Coz living without you is life-dead
For I love you more than you think I do
And it will, in my heart, continue to glow
"I love you but it didnt last"
And if it happens you will be saying that
I'll hold back the tears, and in silence screamin'
YES I LOVED YOU, but I CHOSE TO KEPT IT WITHIN

2005-10-27T11:11:00.000-08:00

A PSYCH TEST

I got this forwarded message from jay which is quite interesting. I shared this to all my close buddies and only one of them got the right answer.

A story about a girl:
While at the funeral of her own mother, she met this guy whom she did not know. She thought this guy was amazing, so much her dream guy she believed him to be, that she fell in love with him there and then. A few days later the girl killed her own sister!

Question: What is her motive in killing her sister?

HMMMM,,,would you know?

2005-10-19T03:13:00.000-08:00

Jason Code

Anecdote: Borj was trying to make a story and told us that he was with Aaron in G-mall to watch Da Vinci Code not knowing that Da Vinci code is only a book and has not yet been filmed. Rommel and I burst into laughters and Borj just laugh the loophole of his story, hence, the title of this blog.

It hurts when someone you hold dear has forgotten you. This is what happen to Borj. He has forgotten the JayR that he knew in the past. My only consolation there is that I still am in his heart. Yes I knew it.

"Hi ironicjayR, Im very much ok now. Galing kami Magellan's cross, Uwi kami Davao tomorrow. Wala nagbago sakin physically. Meet ta this week ha. Memorize ko pa naman ang downtown."

That was Borj's message which gave me the hope that the once lovely tandem we had will have its new chapter, a new beginning, a new twist in this game called life, a new journey back to our paradise.

"Davao nako. Let's meet up tomorrow. Dun sa Cheers na sabi mo"
"ugma kita ta ha. SA Cheers 5:30 naa nako didto. Kaw una tagad ha kay wala ko kahinumdom nimo"

My heart leaps in joy for i am excited for the meeting after a month of great longing. A time to relive the fantasies again and establish the tower that has slowly shattered into ground zero. Good to know that before it reaches its final destruction, a new hope sprout to regain its towering glory.

October 19, 2005
5:15pm:

I hurriedly put off my work. Shut down the computer, arrange my table and prepared myself to see Borj Again. Rommel gave a missed call. One, two, three miss calls.

5:30

I reach claveria in front of Cheers. I texted Borj for his whereabouts. Rommel told me that he will be meeting with Borj too. There i Saw him on the other side of the road. I went to him and we talk. While we were talking, Borj passed by and there Rommel followed him.
Si JayR, Rommel introduced me to Borj. And there I go I hugged him a bit and felt his presence. I was really happy and ecstatic to see the same old Borj that I learned to love. The chinito look again! huh!

We went up. Consumed several minutes deciding which food to order until we end up ordering two egg sandwich for me and Borj, a glass of mangoe juice and ice tea for him, while Rommel had his stomach filled with his Mami and a glass of ice tea.

There we go. At first we werent able to say anything. We wanted to ask questions yet our minds were just preoccupied with the longing deep within. Staring at each others in great anticipation for the night ahead.

Goin down to the memory lane, we remembered that that was the place we were when we bid farewell to each other as he was accordingly on his final trail towards home. That ambiance of the night reenergize the emotion filled room backgrounded by a music so lovingly suited to unmatch its melody.

We talk about the past. All about the past. The people we were connected with, the adventures and misadventures we had, the things we did, we talked, the places we went, and everything that comes to mind including much of our sexcapades.

In between takes, silence domain the table and allowed a few minutes of stares, smiles and laughters in the end.

Whoa what a night of reminiscing and great outlook for tomorrow. I love the feeling i had that very moment.

8:00 pm

The waiters told us that they're gonna be close. Hmm we get out of the place and started our seemingly unending stroll around the city. From claveria, pass by UM, straight towards San Pedro. Decided to continue the walk till we reach Ilustre. During the walk, more often than not, silence reigned.

We reach at NEt express Ilustre, stayed there for a couple of minutes. WE finally get out and continue the walk. WE pass by Taps and there we saw Mark and Aaron. Borj did not join Rommel in mingling with the two. When i check his heartbet, its faster than usual, i really dont know what it means. AFtewhich we eat. I only consumed a can of coca cola while Borj ordered a glass of coffee to match with his ordered egg (i dunno whats the name of that street food which obviously doesnt fit with my tastebud). Stayed there for quite sometimes and still talk about people and oh well not again SEX!

I texted Harry to tell him about Borj, but the former is on a videoke session with his other friends. So there we go, we continued our stroll. Huh! we were like turtles walking in the streets, talking and laughing everything out. We were brought by our feets to Net express Bonifacio but decided to go back. Back to Bolton and finally had a stop at Jollibee Bolton. Ordered three jolly spaghetti and talk talk talk and talk again.

Harry texted me that he saw the three of us. Inside Jollibee I saw my fuckin friend Mark (sorry for the word, haha). AFter consuming our spaghetti, talking unending web of past events, talking about that ceratin jollibee crew, the cute people that coming to the store, the by passers, we finally decided to leave when Borj compalained about a severe pain on back of his neck. Huh! twas something that bothered me really.

We continued our walk until we bid Rommel goodbye. We both proceed to Jollibee San Pedro and there talk for hours, enjoying the rest of the night reminiscing about the life we once had. Whoa! what a lovely scene it was. Two mortals into the night of visiting the past and its entangled web of twists and turns. Hugs, stares, smiles, all these and more to cap the night together.

Borj, thanks for comin back. You're still the man! Continue rockin dude.

I love you.....

~jayR

2005-10-07T02:30:00.000-08:00

The Voice

I hate it when I miss someone. I hate to recall the laughters and tears of yesterdays. I want to live my life today and prepare for my grand tomorrow. Yet, i cannot escape from my past. THe past would still be there for me.

Last night, while i was lying on a couch watching the idiot box, the phone rang. My niece received the call and told me somebody's lookin for me at the other end.
Hmmm, i was a bit lazy to get out of the couch and take the call. Seconds passed, i did get into the phone.

"Can i speak with JayR"

The very first thing that came to mind upon hearing the line with such a soothing voice was borj. Yeah it was his voice. The voice which i was longing to hear this past few days. I miss this friend of mine. He's been into his journey way back home. The last time i saw him was the time we had a short talk at Cheers. The last time he texted me was when he told me he's having a hard time. The last time i texted him, Scott was the one who replied. I texted her mother but the she was in the office that time and Borj wasnt there.

And there you go, last night, everything seem to be in a magic realism that i saw in the teleserye Vietnam Rose, where the fulfillment of a fantasy is in action. Whoa! what a nice feeling it is.

I miss Borj

I miss your company

I miss the laughters we had shared

I miss your i love you's, hugs and kisses

I miss you

In time our path will cross again.

When you have completed your journey back home

2005-10-02T14:15:00.000-08:00

I Miss . . ..
Have experience sometimes when you are not doing anything, you are just looking at life's ironies , creating fantasies and weaving dreams for tomorrow and yet without you realizing, tears have flowed down to your cheeks?

This is exactly what i am feeling right now. This one boring sunday afternoon. I decided to leave the house and join the techno savvy in the internet world.

And now, here i am writing a piece of my mind, my emotions and everything in between.
I miss Bohol... Yes i miss my hometown where i was born and raised. Lots of memories i left there, I miss my friends there, my family , my relatives. i miss Bohol a lot, i miss the simple life i lived there. whoa!!!! I hope can come home soon again...

I miss schooling. Yes! i love to go to school and enhance my wits. I miss the pressure from school papers, projects and everything that is student stuffs. I miss the four walls of the classrooms, the strict teachers, the boring ones, the lively and beautiful one's whom i idolized.

I miss my girlfriend. Though we are of the same place, its been months since we saw each other. Yes, we dont actually have time for each other. Whatever the outcome for this no-meeting-relationship, that remains to be seen.

I miss my friends.

I miss the wits, the beauty and everything that I can see in Borj. I miss his company. I hope we can get together soon.

Hmmmm, I will miss LR, his gift of gab, his chinito look, his childish acts, i will miss him now that he is destined for cagayan de oro. So long my friend. Till we meet again.

Hay, i miss everyone. I miss happiness. I miss love....

waaaaaaaaaa, whats seem to be happening to me... anyone can tell?

2005-09-09T15:54:00.000-08:00

The FINALE (?)

At the end of the day, you'll find yourself exhausted and tired from the trek that you have engaged upon. But before you laid back and pamper yourself with the delight of a long sound sleep, the memories from the trails you have passed by will be gathered and somehow it will make you smile or even cry.

Last night, a got a message from borj asking me to meet him for perhaps the last time over. We meet at Mercury Drugs claveria, had a stroll towards netex bonifacio until we decided to sit together for a refreshing drink.
There we went to Cheer's in claveria. Ordered a glass of mango juice and a hamburger for me as well as a glass of ice tea with a chicken sandwich for him.

There we are at one corner of that place, we talk about life. His way back home and the memories we shared together for the past months that we were together. The mood was a little bit heavy yet we manage to bring out some good laughter every now and then. But i cannot deny that i was about to burst into tears, fortunately i held back and continue putting smiles in my lips. I dont want to remember a finale meeting become emotional with tears witnessing two souls that have greatly bonded together, unfortunately, one of them has to prepare for his graceful exit in his journey home.

Twas a scene of great longing. Staring at each other in nothingness. Creating an ambiance that is forcefully lightened.

AS the wise men said, everything has to end. And before we knew it, we were saying the word i hate to utter. G O O D B Y E
The deal that we made, a month later, that remains to be seen...

And after the seemingly long heavy night it was, i saw myself lying down in bed, gathering every details of the final meeting, until tears falls down into my cheeks and sealed the night of loneliness and great longing.

AS always, sleep brought me back to my fantasies....

as always....

2005-09-07T09:30:00.000-08:00

UNTIL THEN : Sending you Home

Here I am again, breaking my silence of my heart on something that has to do with my life, my interaction with people around me and the feelings in between. This is in response to Borj’s blog "A trail Towards HOme"

***

You have traveled far enough in search for the real essence of life, and in the process you came to a crossroad where you have to decide which way to go and which trail to follow. There you have followed the path where at the end; we both find and knew each other. We wander around and continue the search until we dare fully created our own paradise. Far from the exhausting journey we have indulged ourselves upon.

In our fantasies we weaved our dreams of a life that is beyond our wishes, beyond the child in us and beyond the wheel of life. The kingly sun continues to give its warmth for us to feel. The wind gave its soothing caress for the hearts that started to beat the symphony of human emotions. We loved the life it was. As the chirping birds from atop the tree witnessed how we hide the compassion for the world.

It was pure happiness, undaunted happiness it was. No words could suffice how it feels to be with someone sharing the same thought and feelings about LIFE. Yet, one day I just woke up realizing you were looking back at yesterdays, imagining how simple life can be, how life has given you the opportunities to fully become the person that you envisioned yourself to be.

And before the sun sets in, before it gave way to the moon, you too finally decided to bring yourself back home.

Home where you think you could feel again the security and loved that has brought you to life. . . where the essence of reality is speaking the words of unscripted roller-coaster ride with life . . where the loving embrace of a mother is awaiting in great longing.

I am happy, Yes! I really am happy knowing you will finally go back to the nest that once sheltered you from the predators around. You may be able to fully grown your wings to fly by yourself, but in reality, you needed the wind beneath your wings!!!

Yes I am happy, or am I?

Maybe yes, maybe not….

For it means a sudden stop to the tandem that knows no limitations, a sudden end to the ties that existed amidst the hypocrisy in the deceptive world outside.

And now I finally get into the depth of your thoughts. I finally read the lines that you have uttered. It is indeed a manifestation of goodbye after the long day at our paradise. It is a farewell to life that we dared to go against.

And with the moonless night, the cool breeze dazzling and flushing unto your cheeks, reminding you of your human thirst for peace of mind. Yet, you’re afraid of what the night has to offer, Fear not Borj, for on your journey way back home, my heart will be there, just listen to the echoes of your own, and felt my presence.

Inasmuch as I would like to you send you off home personally, you chose to be alone. ALL ALONE IN YOUR PATH BACK HOME. You may encounter the ghostly ocean played unruly music and shake your ship and threaten your voyage, fear not borj, for it is not the end of everything. Master Death will not successfully lead you to another path underneath the world, believe in yourself.

It is now the high time to show to the world that you are brave, that you can make it. If you have made possible those seemingly impossible things in the past, if you have thought of the most unthinkable in life, its no different right now. You can still make it happen.

I was there in silence, waiting for the right moment to show the compassion, but I knew if there are good things that never last, there are those which just don’t start.

And as you take your hand to wave the final gesture of goodbye, I will be looking at life in nothingness until your image dissolve in oblivion, until the horizon eats up the wave of loneliness. Alone you must go, yes! Alone again I must live my life. As the memories of the past continue to haunt me and challenge me to keep the flame alive, my heart became numb and cold for the calling. Yes! My eyes are now dry for tears have already deserted them, for nothing more can be squeezed for my heart to bleed. Cry no more, bleed no more!!

For I know . . .

You will be safe back home.

And before you embarked yourself and laid your feet back on track, remember the memoirs I left in your heart. May it continue to shines there even if the blissfulness of life is creating yet another chapter for you to start!!

And as the lighting sliced the sky like a fiery sword, it sends a strong message…

My love this is not really goodbye….

BUT

UNTIL THEN. .. . . ~JAYR~

2005-09-03T10:42:00.000-08:00

CLUELESS part2

After such a horrible night of receiving messages from borj which i really dont have any hints on what he wanted to tell me, he called me up on the phone and explain something which in one way or the other shed light to the things he wanted to do with his life. But then, there is still the confusions and questions that linger into my mind till this very moment.

Gusto ko lang sabihin sa iyo yon, Gusto ko na ng katahimikan . . . . Nag.iisip pa lang ako
....mahalin mo na lng sarili mo at buhay mo
takot lang kasi ako sa mangyayari eh. Wala akong matakbuhan. Wag ka mag.isip na tayo ang may problem....

How can understand you borj, when you dont exactly told me the real story behind this drama your portraying right now? And yet you were asking me to make up with Romeo before you depart, how could I, when you yourself didnt bother to listen me when i was asking you to make up with Harry. Yes! I was happy knowing you have finally told Romeo the real score, but then please do respect me on my decision as what i did with your decision before.

Wherever you maybe, wherever life leads us, i hope and i pray that one day, our path will crossed again !

thank you , goodbye

jayR

2005-08-31T13:57:00.000-08:00

CLUELESS

While i was watching the famed Pinoy Big Brother , somebody gave a call on my mobile phone. When i checked it...

Missed Call: Borj_jason

Oh well it has been quite a while since we saw each other and even communicate each other may it by SMS messaging or a call from him through the landline phone. Seconds later, i received a text message and its simply asking my whereabouts, whats new with me, inquiring about alan and james and he even tried to crack a joke, which in fairness made me smile. AFterwhich i replied, the next messages i received from him were disturbing.

Some of his text messages were as follows: (some are edited for private reasons)

.....Peace this time, i dont know tomorrow. Thanks for everything. Baka makalimutan ko na sabihin. Wag moko kalimutan ha. Once in urlife may borj ka na nakilala.

Thank u for urso kind to me.Gudbye. bkaa makalimutan ko eh. Bigla ako mawala at least nakapagpaalam. Ingatan mo sarili mo ha. Salamat

Those were some of his messages that kept me awake for the rest of the night. I was bothered really because when i tried to ask him whats going on, his reply was more disturbing message fromt he previous one
"When the seas runs dry. When my heart ceases to beat. And when my cold corpse is laid to rest. But then i will and shall remember you always. My soul will come to sing your name"
Whew!
*****
My dear Borj ,

i really couldnt figure out your drama last night. I am really clueless on whats happening. All i am wishing for is you will be in good hand and you will always be safe. Thank you too for everything. I hope we could meet again.
I love you friend. You will always be a part of me.

I cant do nothing coz you are not telling me anything. Just in case, you know my number, my landline and my email, you can contact me anytime, ill be willing to extend my heart for you.

Again, thank you and see you again whenever our path crossed once more.

I may not understand your move nor your words for now, i hope in the days to come i shall be able to read between the lines.

love lots
jayR

2005-08-31T10:41:00.000-08:00

SAy Goodbye to ironicjayR ; Bids adieu to jerome_lee

ironicjayR joined the channel
@$#$ sets jerome_lee -o

When destiny brought me here in Davao, i thought i would go nowhere. I hop from one place to another hoping to find my rightful place under the sun. Befriending strangers to find the sense of belonging. Till one day i found myself in a world where i could finally show up and be the me that my human thirst for the true me is looking for. NO pretensions, unmasking the the superficial face that once became my armor to keep from away from the scrutinies of the outside world.

But then such world where i stumbled upon is nothing but a world of pretensions. A world of illusions and deceptions. NOnetheless, i find a little bit of freedom, hence, ironicjayR and jerome_lee was born. Two different people two different aliases signifying one man that tried to go against the current yet failed miserably in his quest for the true happiness.

I meet people. Several people have touched my life and became part of it. Some stayed quite longer, some stayed just to say hello, still others did not even care to notice my existence. Those people help me redefine life, brought back the smiles on my lips, help me thought the meaning of love, help me felt loved and be loved, but those people were also responsible of letting me shed tears of pain. Help me spelled the word CRY.

But then, those experiences with them helped me of what i become today. I continued to live my life in such unrealistic world without me realizing i have become the total opposite of the 'Me' that i have envisioned myself to be. I have learned to hurt people. I have learned to play with others feelings. I have become numb!

until......

@#$#$%% slaps ironicjayr with a bit of a large trout

which brought me back to my senses. How fool am i to be acting the way I did. It was not the real me, i swear. It was just a product of the world that I have indulged myself with, the product of the people who have came into my world.
I am sorry. I never really intend to hurt you. YOu know who you are. i am really sorry.
For now, i will stay away from such unscrupulous world until the day that i will find the old me that people loved. Until i find the way back home.

Till then.

gtg

ironicjayR left the channel
jerome_lee has quit (connection reset by peers)
****disconnected****

2005-08-15T02:40:00.000-08:00

NOT MY DUMB BUSINESS INDEED

Weve been friends for quite a long time already. I thought the friendship that we were able to established wont be destroyed by anything that we may encounter along, for i thought i knew you that much.
Sad to say...
I was wrong
I was wrong to dig into your life for according to you, its none of my dumb business. Well, come to think of it, you're right. I have no right to take into your life. Its yours afterall, who am I really to know every single detail about whats happening in you. I was just too assuming that i do have the right, and im sorry for thinking and behaving like that.
Last night, i have realized im nothing in you. I was just one of those who tried to take part of your life but i never was and never will be part of it.
The best thing i can do now is to stay away from you and never bother to do the foolishness that i was doing all these times, that is, to take part of your life's decisions and routine.
Thank you anyway for the memories that we shared together. They may not be as important as those memories with other people in your life, well at least i tried to take part in you. Unfortunately it was, it is and it will not be my dumb business afterall...

2005-08-15T02:38:00.000-08:00

BORJ: Reliving heroism

Dont judge the book by its cover.
Oh yes this cliche sometimes make good sense, more often than not, people displayed a persona that is totally opposite from the real person that they are deep inside.
Borj is one such guy whom at first look can get a negative feedback. Well it could be his rugged style and one of its kind fashion statement. But then, it is the borj that i love to be with, the borj that i have learned to make part of my insane life.
He added yet another reasons for me to love him better. When i get to know more of him deep inside, i found a borj oozing with passion for love and care. His innate talents are something to be proud of. His innermost being is something you cannot take for granted. And not to mention his wits that could spell the difference. Seemingly perfect guy in this imperfect world we live in.
This morning, i found something new in him. HIs heroism in the name of friendship. He once told me about him sacrificing his life for his friends, and what he did last night to a common friend of ours gave life to what he has told me. His actions redefined the meaning of friendship. He has proven that true friends indeed will be there through thick and then.
That chinito looking guy, skaterboy, who seem to be a happy go lucky one helped someone to be freed in a situation which is difficult to get out. My heart leaps for joy for im proud for this guy. I am happy for i have gain a friend that i knew will be there for me when i needed him the most. I have been reassured that our friendship will be there to take on the obstacle as we continue our quest in this game of life.
Borj, you know im proud to have someone like you in my life. Im proud of what you did to our friend. Im glad you became part of my life and I wish we could be there as tomorrow unfolds and bring a new sunshine in our search for the true meaning of happiness.
As always, you have added a feather on your cap on what you did. YOu triumphantly established another borj that proved to the world, youre worth every mortal that loved you and cared for you.
Youre a friend
Youre a hero
Youre the borj
that i love

2005-08-08T08:54:00.000-08:00

Im in love!!!

I was alone in the wilderness of life, searching for the unending vastness of destination where i could truly find the real meaning of happiness, there you came. Unexpectedly youre presence gave a twist to the already tiresome life it was. You gave a new meaning to my life, you gave a sweet caressing melody to the tune that has become so dull and lousy.

When you came, I feel exactly what i felt before. The same thing that caused me sleepless nights and oh well, the same thing that made me cry. I was reluctant to accept the fact that im fallin in love again. Borj is telling me I have found the right one. But then i resist the feeling, fearing for the hurtings that came along with it. But then love really moves in a mysterious ways. The more i refused the sparkling deep within, the more it beats the rhythm.

Then i took the courage to tell you what i felt. I took the courage to be hurt by rejection or to be elated with acceptance. I was ready to face everything in the name of love. I was ready, all ready to fight for the feelings i have for you.

Three sleepless nights of long telephone conversations keep our world together. Getting to know each other and listening to the echoes of each others heart. Then finally you gave me the sign to pursue my love for you.

I was too happy to know theres the possibility of us establishing a relationship that may be against the norms of the society but too valuable for both of us.

And then last night....

LAst night you gave me that much anticipated answer from your loving lips. That YES! oh i really cant explain how i felt for that very moment you accepted me to become part of your life. You made me complete again. You have put the last piece of the puzzle of this life of mine. You made me whole again. You played the melody of the sweetest music ever heard. OUr hearts speaks the same language of love. Oh yes! i love you baby. I really care for you.

Thank you for loving me. Thank you for accepting me in your life. Thank you for making my life complete.

Thank you, thank you , thank you

I really really love you baby...

I hope we could spell eternity as we continue our travails in this love world. Sometimes, we may encounter trials, i hope our love will bring us to the path where we can be happy as always, and be loved forever.

I love you

I love you

I love you

jayR

2005-08-01T13:45:00.000-08:00

Bared...

there was angst

there was a walk.out

there was a misunderstanding

there was an apology

there was forgiveness

and then there was celebration

a night of happiness, laughters, opening of the hearts and mind to resolve what has yet to be resolved.

thank you borj for the night..

thank you for opening up to me the borj that you are , the good and the bad side in you...

and i remain

2005-07-29T18:22:00.000-08:00

One Last Goodbye

You told me you dont want to have friction in our relationship. You told me you valued me as your friend.

I thought petty things wont even give a slight friction on us. I thought our friendship is valuable that nothing can destroy it.

But i was wrong

For just a very small thing which if you would try to scrutinize is nothing but a scrap to even put our relationship on a threshold of goodbye.

But what shall i do, ive been hurt for the fact that you dont even said goodbye and leave me in the stillness of the night.

Yes, i may have made a mistake, but if you look at it, it was so shallow to be taken into consideration. but then it has happen, and all i can do is preserve my pride.

that cross sign

that no stares

that no words

that walkout

that no goodbye

Can we consider it as a manifestation of the downfall of the once lovely tandem that has existed in this much hype and much hypocrite world?

if it is,

then allow me to say thank you for everything, somehow you have touch my life and somehow you have given me the smile into my lips. Though twas temporary, i valued it the most

thank you

2005-07-25T14:37:00.000-08:00

Cleared

Its over for us jayR
Thank you for everything...

those were the exact words that borj has told me when we chatted last night on MIRC after he learned that i was using another nick without him knowing.

Heres the story

After i hear mass yesterday, i went online to check my mails. I dropped by at the MIRC channel and therev had a fun chat with my friend patrick. He was using another nick so i decided to use another nick too and not the usual registered nick that i have. Someone in the channel was looking for borj, so i decided to mack him and ask why. We chatted and befriended each other. He is Burn, a punk long haired guy. We talk about Borj when he told me that the latter is online at that moment. I never thought him to be online for accordingly he will be at a family affair last night. There i saw his nick and chatted him. He told me we will have an EB together with Burn not knowing that i am his jayR, hehe. After a while, i decided to tell him the real me. And that was it. He was mad! Huh!

Later however, he asked me for a drink and fetch me together with Burn at Net Express Bonifacio. WE headed somewhere in Anda and had a drinking spree. Imagine three different world collide for one spectacular night of camaraderie and beyond. Whew! Borj the skaterboy, Burn the punk and me oh well the corporate man! hahaha,,,

Borj has cleared up something that is going on that has occupied my mind for the past days. And such was an explanation that i gladly accepted. Hmmmmm...

We drank till 4 am .

We had a great night once more.

Were happy together

Were back to what has been started

Weve found a new friend in Burn...

as always

Thank you borj for the night.

Looking forward for this weekend night out that we planned

2005-07-24T18:28:00.000-08:00

The Real Me

Ive been bothered by borj's messages lately. He's been asking me whats wrong with me, he's been asking forgiveness for something i dont even know. Romeo also told me about something i tried to change things the way they were. Hmmm... this leads me to this blog to explain my side. I hope they will be able to read this.

Brow, i am still the same JayR that you knew, the same me that you saw the night we were together celebrating our friendship and beyond. You know, its not the typical me to really get serious into something which is lame if not foolish to absorbed with my senses.

Yes, i understand your predicament, i knew you were just too concerned about me, and i appreciate it very much but then, you too have to realize that i have said my piece, and would it not be enough for you to understand that nothings wrong with me? and that i am still the jayR that came into your lives and will be there till you give up on me.

yes i came to a point of deciding whether to give up the friendship or to keep it, but i realize it would make me no good if i gave up you both coz i knew deep within you have somehow became part of the pillars of this shattered life of mine.

and with that, i want you to know, i still am the friend that you knew and i still will be the JayR that will be there for you till eternity calls me.

and with this blog, i hope everything is clear, i hope that my no-response in your SMS sometimes doesnt mean im giving you cold shoulder, maybe im just too busy or may i just run out of load.

2005-07-22T18:54:00.000-08:00

The Hurting

Inasmuch as i dont want to show how i feel, i cant help it.

From the very beginning ive been looking for my place under the sun. A place where i can find people with the same level with what i believe i am in. And then they came unexpectedly in the world where every human is grasping for self-belonging. They came and touch my life to the point of bringing back the smile into my lips in my continued play in the strange place that i am in right now.

unexpectedly, a feeling grows within that i cant help but keep. i dont want to lose the friendship we shared, i dont want to spoil the happiness i felt when were together. keeping the feeling that would most likely trample down the tower that our relationship has establish to lessen the burden is better than showing off whats within and suffer and add another load to carry at the end.

i am happy, were all happy. and who else isnt.

but then everything has transpired that fate has repeatedly played unto everyones heart. i forbid to stay strong. my trembling knees put me in shiver and shoke me in pain and there i am on bended knees weeping the silent hurting. each tear that fall maybe a manifestation of lifes unruly music but i took it the other way around.

and now im happy. happy for my friend who have found their share of happiness in their loving embrace.

i may have done everything just right in your eyes, but there will be those insane moments when i am faced with the realization that there are individuals out there that are neither thinking of me nor loving me at this moment.

As one of the famous philosophers stated, "That which does not destroy us only makes us stronger". And this developoment would not in any way make me fail in my quest instead it will help me move on with more determination to pursue a life that i have envisioned myself with.

this may actually serve as an invaluable learning experience. i accept the fact that i will always have to overcome obstacles in life in order to achieve my goals,

friends, dont worry about me, i knew you will be both happy, i will just be here for you both when you needed me, you will soon understand that everything just makes me a more rounded and successful person. It is in this silent scream revealed my limitations and motivate me to overcome them.

and indeed i am hurt but i can still show to the world that i have been the man that stood for the past 25 years amidst all the life's unfriendly nature towards me.

but im happy, i really am.

now i can officially set myself free from the burden of loving someone and thereby resisting it...

as always, it would be love that will keep me moving on.

and i knew it

it will be there for me when i need i the most.

though i shed tears

smiles still dominate my lips

2005-07-20T19:38:00.000-08:00

The Guilt Within

guilt Pronunciation Key (glt)n.
The fact of being responsible for the commission of an offense.
Law. Culpability for a crime or lesser breach of regulations that carries a legal penalty.
Remorseful awareness of having done something wrong.
Self-reproach for supposed inadequacy or wrongdoing.
Guilty conduct; sin.

Etymology: Old English gylt delinquency: the fact of having committed an offense esp. against the law

: feelings of culpability especially for imagined offenses or from a sense of inadequacy : morbid self-reproach often manifest in marked preoccupation with the moral correctness of one's behavior

HOwever it is being defined, still it point out to one thing, and that is how i am feeling right now. For the past two nights, ive been haunted with guilt deep inside for i have done something which i knew is not the right thing to do. Though the person did not directly told me about it, i am not that fool to tell myself that nothings wrong between the two of us and what happened that night did not in any way put a scar on the relationship that we were triumphantly established.

Too heavy to carry a burden deep within. AS if a flaming emotion would burst anytime soon. But then everytime i wanted to shout it out, there is the call for decency that put cold water to the once hazing emotion. And in the end there i am shivering in pain, of hopelesness for somehow the guilt have weaken me in my continued quest in this game of life.

I have consoled by telling myself that at least i have asked forgiveness but then if i will look at things the way it should be, the apology should be address to someone else for unwittingly that person never had the idea of whats happening or what has transpired from his absence.

Whatever will happen, wherever this guilt would bring me, one things for sure, i have subjected myself in a world where nothings permanent, though i want things the way they are now, i cant help but let go if there is a need to.

But then again,

i feel sorry for myself

i feel guilty

i am

i really am...

2005-07-19T17:34:00.000-08:00

The triumvirate

We came from different worlds yet with a common denominator which we sarcastically accepted, we were able to find solace and comfort with one another. The triumvirate of JayR, Romeo and Borj also known as the mentally challenge and psychologically impaired individuals. LOLZ

Last night we had a bonding together. Just a simple celebration of friendship despite of whatever the outcome from the polluted minds of some individuals out there. We dine in at Penong's. We really had a fun dinner. Chatting and laughing in between taking of foods. Just about anything that came to mind that we just laugh off. Some kinda serious yet we manage to get the heck out of it and continue the fun. Though there are times when borj get serious or should i say just too preoccupied with thoughts on what will be the issue the next day after such an encounter. we all know for a fact that there are lots of mortal eyes looking at us that may lead to an issue the following day over the net, yet we did not care less.

After the dinner, we went to the nearby Pidok's and had our taste of being a singing champions. Hahah, actually twas only Meong who sang his heart out during the entirety of our videoke session. We really had so much fun there. as if nobody was looking at us we manage to forget everyone and owned the world. Hahaha.

After which we strolled down the street , passed by at lafia net then we send Meong off to his home. Huh! twas a long walk indeed from ilustre all the way to boulevard and way back to claveria.

Night oh night! twas indeed a fantastic night that would be written in the pages of the books of a triumvirate who have finally found the people of the same frequency. Intellectuals we are! hahaha, self serving.

A repeat? that would be a good idea. and as always, it would be worth looking forward to.

Before i get home, borj asked if when could we meet again, i just answered with a smile for uncertainties has been a constant mindset in a set.up where every looking mortals are keeping their stares glued unto this creatures who just wanted to have space and be happy in a company where they belong.

Whatever is the issue that would come out, well just have to answer with these three expressions which we repeatedly uttered last night a hundred times over...

Dont labeled me like that....!@
Its not my cup of tea... and as always
My lips are sealed...

2005-07-17T19:06:00.000-08:00

The Borj Effect

From the beginning since we started our friendship, i feel at ease with this guy. He always let you feel comfortable and he seem to be a nice friend to reckon with. Days passed when finally our path crossed, we knew each other more than enough to put a cornestone of our friendship.

Loving sweet and caring, these are the adjective that would best describe this mortal. Though these words does not suffice on how great this creation of God is, somehow it will give you an idea of how great he is. Multi-talented and of course that chinito look again! huh! Mr. Webster could not give any words to further justify his beauty that is par excellance. And wait, the brain! indeed! he is the total package guy. He may look kinda weird on his fashion statement, still he got an edge to every guy around, thats borj.

Last night, after the first planned night out didnt push through, we finally had a chance to have it. Though i was waiting for hours before he could fetch me up to where i was last night, it was worth the wait. In all fairness, he came despite his not so good condition. He was under the scorching heat of the sun during the day then suddenly the cold rain drenched them from their sweaty shirt, who would feel good in it?

First stop, Mandarin! we had our dinner there though he preferred to have it somewhere in a dimly light barbecue houses, i insist we have it there, a clean place to dine. He showed me some of his pictures on their mountain trekking adventures. Whew! what a picturesque place it was, how i wish i really could join him again when he climb up. i hope my schedule will fit when he will ask me to join him on his next travail. Something to look forward to. I myself loves nature so thats one of the denominator of why we click together despite our seemingly opposite worlds.

While we had our dinner, we talk about anything and everything that came to mind. One such issue that was discussed and rebutted upon was about a friend of ours. Well, i wont elaborate it here for i know some things are best kept secret.

After dinner we headed to Pidok's and sing our heart out together in that dimly lit videoke room. We ordered 4 bottles of redhorse. Hmmm thats how we thought we ould consumed for the entire night. WEre not drinker by heart. Were just having alcohol to somewhat give excitement to the night.

And who else would stand up there but borj. His sweet voice and rugged looks were his weapon to steal the limelight away from everyone. NO wonder one guy joined us and stared at him as if to eat him alive. hahaha, he just took it as it is. NOt his cup of tea...this line he spoke several times after i had told him about it. Not our cup of tea indeed!

Well as far as my memory served me right, he sang the songs: Can you feel the love tonight ~heartfelt rendition~!, Sometimes when we touch ~themesong daw, wahahah~, Next in line --> as requested by the waiter, SAy that you love me ~my fave song, a guy gave the microphone to us for the piece, but of course its borj who got the voice so i pass on the microphone~, Baleleng ~that was an awesome rendition of this visayan song, everyone was stunned in the room~, i just forgot some of the songs...

After we consumed the four bottles of redhorse, we ordered two more, but we were given four bottles. hahaha... WE talk some more, from our personal stories and involvements, whew! james you're part of the convee, haha, to some politically correct insinuations of what is happening to our country. It made me appreciate borj even more for he has proven to me that he does not only got the beauty he also got the brains. We also shared trivias on different genre. Argue a little bit about it but in the end, come up on the same direction, fyi, this trivia game is what we do to bond together even if were apart at times. Thats what you call bondig of the intellectuals..hahaha..

Before we knew it, we were left in the room alone coz the rest of the people are gone. ITs 2:30 in the morning. Till finally the waiter told us that they are goin to close. One bottle not yet down, we leave it standing anyway.

WE strolled around the vicinity till we reached lafia net. He checked for his other buddies but they were not there so we decided to go. We were at Jollibee san pedro when we finally decided to go online. WEnt back to Net express ilustre. AFter which we call it a night...hahaha

And this is what he text was when i woke up at 11:00 am. "Ok ka lang? Thanks, i had a great time. I enjoyed your company. iba ka.

Thank you borj for the night. it was worth it. You are really great. HOpe to do a repeat soon. Hahaha, looks like were sticking it out together. Thanks again. You made my night. You're the man.

JayR

2005-07-14T18:07:00.000-08:00

Prideless but principled

Human as we are, there is the so called pride or ego that sometimes ruled our emotions, our decisions and even our life in general. Yet in some instances, this pride of ours keep our dignity intact. Now here comes the principle. Something that everyone used to as a guideline for what he believe is right and just. Things get complicated as these two humane tendencies collide. Which is which. Is it pride or is it just a principle being followed.

These question lingered into my imagination after a series of SMS exchange with borj last night, oh well, twas early morning already. He came to a decision where friendship , emotion and everything in between has to be taken into consideration, yet in the end, frienship has to be sacrificed.

He asked me to extend the message to our friend, and i quote " Im so happy for you, I saw you both together again, and that is a good sign that you're back to each others arms" Accordingly, his guilt somehow was unleashed and the burden he was carrying all these times has been lessen.

Though friendship now is at stake, he doesnt care less purportedly because he doesnt want to interfere into a relationship to which he knows the other party is most serious of. Very well said my friend. Though i hardly get what you were trying to figure out last night, somehow when i woke up this morning i realized how noble you were with the decision you made. Prideless but principled decision. thats how you coined an adjective to describe the situation. Oh yes! indeed it is the right thing to do.

With this development, i have come to a decision too that is hard to do yet i think is the best thing to do now. I have to give space and continue a life away from this person whom i learned to love. If incurring pain to myself for someone else's gain is the best thing to do, then i am but willing to give it all.

Thank you for somehow touching my life in that span of time. I know you'd been wanting to be happy, and i guess now you are happy nonetheless, im happy for you too. Thank you for the moments we shared together, those memories we had will always be here in my heart. NOw im going, im setting you free, im giving you the chance to take another chance with the person who happened to be the sound of each whisper of your loving heart.

Thank you.

And to borrow the words of james...."love will be a dream that will never be mine" BUT that would only be in the case of your heart, coz im willing to open my heart again to someone else!

Thank you.

I love you

but

goodbye

LOVE MOVES IN A MYSTERIOUS WAYS
It's always so surprisingWhen love appears over the horizonI'll love you for the rest of my daysBut still, it's a mysteryHow you ever came to meWhich only proves

2005-07-03T18:21:00.000-08:00

Call It A Night

Yes! after a couple of SMS exchange with Harry, i finally decided to join them overnight at the beach. Twas around 11:00 pm when we headed for toril where the rest of the guys are. I, Harry and Ace join together riding a taxi outbound to the beach.There we go, when we reach the place, the noisy-cum-wild-semi drunk guys are there very jolly and enjoying the night. There I saw bogs and borj, simple hi-hello greetings and then Harry gave me the paper plate, hehe... its chow time again!!!I had a chance to talk to Bogs about an issue regarding Ronyl and he clearly explained his side.

Well, whatever is the real score in the issue, that i dont know, i am not part of it so better i wont comment any further. In the entirety of the night I had a chance to bond with of course Harry, Borj and bogs. The rest of the guys are just too busy with their trip-- singing@!!! hehe, nothing else. :)

Well, here i am again, trying to voice out how i saw the guys that night. The way they behave and anything that I have discovered.

Bryan first. Hmmmm, the same old cute friend that he is. Displaying charm and beauty with his blue short and shirt with matching cap outfit last night. He is too sweet to be resisted!!! hmmmm no wonder someone is making false accusation on him purportedly giving him false hopes, bogs by nature is sweet and loving , that i discovered. ITs nice to know someone like him, though i wont say he is the perfect man in the world, he simply is the man whose company you will enjoy. thanks bogs for the company last night.

Borj. The chinito look again!!! oh god forgive me! lolz... Last night i discovered that once upon a time, he work as a DJ (part time) in one of the local radio station, hmmm no wonder he got such voice the may delight those listening ears on that cold night. When he sang, oh well, it caresses the soul of a tired body. Hmmm somewhat exaggerating here, but it really is the real thing. He also open to me what he called " the bad side in him" which i think is only part of his being human, he may deny it being pride to have made him like that rather he said its his lifes principle. Oh well Mr. chinito cutey skaterboy, i wont argue with you on that, ill reserve the argument when whe have the time together, for now i would understand your predicament over the issue you raised last night. Very articulate indeed! a thing i admired with this guy!!! he got brains so to speak! Thanks borj for the night. I enjoyed every minute with you. you rock man!

Harry boy. Oh well my Harry, if not for him i would be there in the first place, hehehe... Still the same quite Harry that I knew from the beginning. But of course that voice again which made me fall, lolz... Singing is his forte and he gave justice to the pieces he sang last night!!! thats my boy!!! unfortunately he sleep while everybody's enjoying the night. Hahaha, overnight sleep at the beach ...hehe.

Rico... oh well, that guy! so much blessed with the voice that could spell eternity. OH yes, he was in fact the singer to beat last night with every song rendition , the refreshing voice could make you stand still in the wilderness of the night.

Edz... hmmm finally i saw this guy whom i have talk to several times on the phone. Finally i meet him before he aboard the plane outbound for Manila where he will be preparing the papers for his Israel invasion. Hmmm, impression? a guy that has a big heart, no wonder friends are flocking out with him.

Ace ... hmmm , a quiet guy full of innocence (?) hehe with matching question mark, i never notice him when everybody was busy singing and dancing the night away.

Rommel , haha, this guy who macked me in mirc channel and asking personal questions even if i havent known him that time. Well, he seem to be a nice friend with smile always decorating his aura through the rest of the night.

Mark (i dunno if i got the name right) , this guy is a hottie one!!! hehehe... his smile alone could make a difference!!!! but i havent known him that much. He was too preoccupied with his role that night in our drinking spree. Too mysterious yet too hot to resist either.

Arnel, hmmm i guess the youngest of us all last time. He was the very first guy whom catches my attention for he was the only one displaying his vigority and candidness. His youthful exuberance was bearable. Innocence lost by the worldly things, he still had his share of the world of a child in one instance of the night.

And that guy whom i didnt know and never get acquainted with last night. Long haired mysterious guy whose presence may not be felt but his aura would say a lot more if discovered deep within

2005-07-02T18:15:00.000-08:00

Harry Harry Night

A couple of days ago, i had a great time with my buddy Harry at SM, we shop, we dine and we watch movie together...heheh... We went to Habagat to check their bush hat but they run out of stock so we decided to go to the department store and choose from the variety of shirts there. He chose a whited printed shirt while i chose the black one - talking about the opposite of things, hehe..

AFter that, we dine at KFC, i consumed a KFC fried chicken while he was just contented with his KFC chicken fillet burger, oh i dont know how it is being called really. AFter which we go upstairs and watch a movie.

After a few minutes of arguing which movie to watch for, we decided to watch the filipino suspense drama Nasaan Ka Man. In fairness to the movie, its not the typical pinoy horror flick which is very predictable and full of shouting. It will wreck your nerves from time to time with each gruesome scenes. You will keep on guessing whats will happen next as the next scene is very unpredictable as mysteries unraveled. Whoa what a movie! worth the 50 pesos per head we paid.

AFter the movie, twas last full show so when we get out from the moviehouse, it was late in the evening. We then went to claveria and had a one hour internet session at lafia. Afterwhich were gone for home...

What a night we had with my buddy harry. Twas time well spent with each other, a rare opportunity for us to bond together since were both busy with each others lives!

HOW ABOUT YOU HAVE YOU WATCH A PINOY FLICK LATELY?

2005-06-22T09:05:00.000-08:00

25

Hmmm, im officially a year older. A turning point in my life has come. Lots of things have happened for the past 25 years of my existence. Half-remembered, half forgotten but there are still people both new and old friends alike who never forget my special day.

Advance Greetings:

mY JOBSTREET family send me their early greetings thru my email.

Hmmm my friendster girls are lording me with advance greetings, haha. Oh yes, Maimai did have it first, then my Hya came follow through. My lil sis gave me a greetings testimonial. Cutify jen too gave me a testimonial in-line for my birthday. Baby LR greeted me when we meet last wednesday and dined at Penongs (see previous blog: AN EARLY TREAT) sIS clarisse announced my birthday in one of the reality tv yg where i am a moderator!, te emz greeted me through ym.

The day itself!
First to greet me yesterday was hedge my bro and here it goes:
...kuya jayR hapi bday. tnx 4 being our frnd. We luv u so much. Hapi bday uli. (sent june 21, 2005 @ 1:04 am)

Second to send her early morning greeting is of course my girl
...Hapi birthday honey" (sent: june 21, 2005 @ 4:16 am)

Third to have it was Raye, hmmmm, from my past...hahaha

Then series of greetings followed from Ate che, cuzn rhodz, cuzn dian, cuzn debi, from my aunt ate tita. Plong gave his greetings through a testimonial in my friendster account.

When i log in to yahoo messenger, charlene greeted me, and later in the afternoon dayen had her wishes for me, she too created a thread for me in ironic yg. An offline message from liza i got after a night out with Harry and the rest of my friends. Harry gave me a three Eric Santos song rendition which he sang justifiably. This is the Moment, Pagbigyan Muli and Ill Never Go....What a night to end my day.

I will end this through the reading from astrology.com

When Mercury is conjunct Venus in the solar return chart, you are more apt to have confidence in your decisions and intellectual capabilities. This is a wonderful time to be in school or to take a course since learning is likely to be an enjoyable experience. You may also make great progress in what most people consider to be a difficult topic or a subject you have had particular trouble with in the past. Facts can be easier to comprehend during this time and the information you receive should be applicable to your present needs or skills

TO ALL OF YOU, I WANNA SAY THANK YOU FROM THE BOTTOM OF MY HEART